I enjoyed reading your story.
I'm sorry it wasn't easier to think of some very fond memories of you Dad.
My father did not have a quick temper, but in serious situations, he was no nonsense and expected respect, not only for himself, but my Mom. My Mom was not as strict as my Dad, so we always asked her first ! LOL She was able to make most answers on the spot, but if it were different or she wasn't sure, she and Dad discussed it in private and came out with a united front on the answer. I sometimes thought Dad was too strict and did not keep up with what should be acceptable for the times and I think Mom thought so too, but still, his word was pretty much law. I do have fond memories though.
It's like someone else said, you never know what goes on inside a home by how people present outside of it. It could be pretty much the same or WAY different. As a young child, I didn't know all the other families were not like ours. Then I grew up, heard stories and was surprised as could be. Part of the live and learn kind of things that happen as we become adults I suppose.
You bring up a good point, and I just saw something more clearly. On the outside, we conform to accepted norms, we all behave similarly, we all look alike to the others. Inside our homes, we can let that go. The stress of the outside is released on the inside. It's a nifty trick we've been trained how to do, a slave system, one of a great many. Oh dear there I go again. @ronthroop, feel free to warble here.
This bird chirps, “You trilled it!” :)