Where do I start when it comes to small talk? Hmmmm, let’s see. I’ll begin with the fact that I used to be a very shy person. I still have crowd fright, and though I’m not as shy as before, it’s still part of me. Back then, my shyness was so bad that if someone stared at me for more than ten seconds, they’d automatically get a “good morning” from me.
That same shyness explains why I struggle with small talk. From the outside, it looks so easy when someone casually starts a conversation, and everything flows. But for me, it feels like standing on a stage without a script. This usually happens when a friend drags me along to a hangout, introduces me to their other friends, and then steps out for a bit. Suddenly, I know I should say something, maybe ask a question, maybe comment on the weather but the words just won’t come. Every second of silence feels like an hour, and my mind is racing with the fear of sounding awkward or, worse, strange. That’s usually when I run to my phone for rescue. I just dey form busy, fiddling with it, scrolling through the weather app or my gallery, all to avoid starting small talk with the friend of my friend.
The good thing is, I’ve been working on it, and I’m slowly getting the hang of things. Small talk becomes easier once you figure out what people are interested in. A simple statement like, “Manchester United form this season bad oooo” can spark banter. Or you can use the ultimate Nigerian conversation starter: “hmmmm, this Naija self, just imagine.” From there, the talk flows naturally. All it really takes is a little confidence booster.
The truth is, there’s nothing to be so worried about. Over the years, as I’ve pushed past my shyness, I’ve learnt that just a few words with a random person can be the beginning of a beautiful friendship that might last a lifetime.
Thanks for reading!!
All images are mine
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Conversations takes time to develop and it takes effort to keep it flowing. You’ve been training yourself, which is admirable. Rather than just be a shy person, you’ve broken through the walls. Well done.
thank you, the encouragement means a lot, now taking the bull by the horn more often now