"Gender" is not a "Person"

in Hive Naija24 days ago

I heard my male friends talk on how women have it easy and how they can get their hands on something because ‘they are women’. I laughed because I am a woman and nothing about my life has been easy. I have had to struggle for everything. However, when I thought about it long and hard, I realized that I might not be looking at it objectively. Even men have their struggles too.


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The truth is I find it hard to look at the world like it is, I look at it like a mirror and that is because I expect more from me than I do anyone else. When my friends were talking about how men have it hard, I argued with them because I was looking at the world from my perspective. It is very hard to see things the way they really are unless you have been there.

Women were not always at the advantage. Even today, there are places where the opinions and rights of women are zero to none. The beginning of the Feminist movements in the late 18th century from the West were a result of the lack of consideration towards women and their place in society. The movement covered the women’s right to vote, own properties, equal pay, education, etc. It is not different in African countries especially in Nigeria, my country, where the place of a woman in her home is heavily dependent on the sex of her baby. I do not think any gender is more disadvantaged than the other is. In fact, I do not believe in gendering people and making it seem their sex is the reason they behave the way they do or can’t be who they want to be. I just believe in the fact that people tend to make awful decisions sometimes.


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We cannot say one gender has more advantage because it is not the case. Every person has his or her own struggles and life to deal with. A person comes out into the world with an assigned sex, but they face the world by themselves and respond to pressure in ways they know best. I made this clear when someone I know started saying quite an awful lot about ‘Nigerian women’ and how ‘Asian women’ are ideal. He has never even been to any part of Asia. It sounded like bullshit to me. There is nothing like a Nigerian woman or an Asian woman. You just have a woman who is a person led by her belief systems, which may not always be right. I do not go around saying Korean men are ideal or what not because before the nationality comes the people. People will be people no matter their citizenship or gender.

When it comes to what gender has the most disadvantage or advantage, I say none has anything because people are people. We face life differently and deal with pressures differently. Our persona is what makes us not our sex. I can point out men who should be on skirts and women who look like men. This is exactly why I do not think there is any advantage or disadvantage that comes with gender. We just have society telling us there is something wrong with having or being a girl child. Society tells our men that they are ‘simps’ for being human. Nothing pisses me off than ‘alpha male’ wannabes and their scummy messages.


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Men should not show emotion. Ladies should not be loud. Men should be strong all the time; talk about your problems and you are weak. Ladies should not dress like men; you take away the charm and blah blah blah. Nonsense everywhere! I understand etiquette but still, it becomes too much when what people are trying to do is change you. I do not respond well to people who always want me to change. Fix me up and make me look like a doll from Cancun. It never works. I have personality. Days when I want to be in shorts and just lounge around. Days when I want to dress up and slay. Days when I just will not get out of bed.

Just like me, people have personalities and experiences. They have their aspirations and belief. Their gender is not what makes them in my opinion. There are no advantages and disadvantages to being human. So come off it… just live like a person.


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Women have fought so hard and long for equality with men. Yet with so many illegal islamic immigrants flooding into Europe and the UK women are getting the raw end of the deal again here. Couple that with all the trans things that are going on, I feel the advances that women rightly gained are being eroded.
We are all people we should all have identical rights. You are you and I am me, enough with these labels and stereotyping. Good post by the way!

 24 days ago (edited) 

That is one major concern I see today. It’s alarming. Over here too. You can see the disregard and disrespect women can receive from ‘men’ who think that they are God’s gift. I never fail to hand it down to anyone (man or woman) who talks down on me. I may be polite as fuck, but my tongue can be as sharp as a medieval sword. And I would give it back ten fold.

lol. Someone said they’ll beat me one day for my hard headedness and I replied they better be prepared to end up loosing their whole “dentition” (knowing quite well he did not know what the word meant because fact, he was dumb!”)

Or when one idiot thought he could talk down on me because I bring myself low enough to deliver food at little cost. I received and cancelled his orders for a week. Marked his number and would reply that I would deliver but he never got anything. Dude came to my shop to apologize in person.

 24 days ago  

Voted by Hive Naija.gif

 18 days ago  

Thank you

It's really sad that in this 21st century someone is judged by his or her gender and not the qiality of the person. For me ita just irrational and that's because a person is known by his integrity and not his or her gender

 18 days ago  

Yes... true. Really sad. Thank you for dropping by❤️

Regardless of gender differences, we are all humans and we deserve to be treated equally.

#dreemerforlife

 18 days ago  

Exactly 👍

The society make so many rules and it is very annoying. People can't boldly do things just because of the limitations that society have put on things. Thanks a lot for sharing this powerful view on this subject matter.

#dreemerforlife

 17 days ago  

🫡

I had a conversation with a couple of men today about this and I left the conversation almost tearing up because I am sick and tired of being looked down on just because of my gender. I am studying a male dominated course, it is exhausting. I almost cried because I felt tired mid-talk. It hit me that I have been fighting over this topic for years and I just thought to myself ,how long more? How long more will I have to keep fighting? Sigh.. it's exhausting