It was a beautiful Friday morning, I woke up excited that particular day, it was my final exam day and I was super excited. A five-year course that was stretched to six years because our lecturers keeps going on strike. There is always a war between the lecturers and the government, leaving the students to suffer the most, like the saying goes when two elephant fights only the grass suffers that has been my experience for the past 6 years so you can imagine my excitement about writing my last exam in school.
I took my bath and dress up for the exam hall, this particular course has been giving me a headache and I just want to get over with it but to my surprise, the exam was not as difficult as I taught which make me 'overjoys' if there is any world like that. I was done with school and I did very well. My parent has been super proud and I can't wait to start making my own money so I thought. `
It was a day to ease all the two weeks of exam stress so my coursemates already planned an after-party that Friday night. I had gone home to relax only for me to wake up to the knock of my friend Joy by the door. 'Lade Lade are you not going to the party it's almost 7 pm and Dapo already called that he is on his way. Dapo is Joy's boyfriend and he is the one taking us to the party. I quickly jumped out of bed and open the door for joy that was looking beautiful. I complimented her and quickly went to the bathroom to get ready for the party.
Joy helped me with my choice of cloth and also with my make-up. She keep talking about how she wished I would get a catch at the birthday party today so I would stop thing about my ex. I just went through a heartbreak. My ex and I genotype is both AS, So I decided to call things off because we don't have a future together and won't want to bring a sickle cell child into this world. It was a difficult decision but we both know that was the best thing to do.
I got to the party ready to unwind and just to have a good time, I started slowly with the alcohol and started dancing, I am a good dancer so it was easy for me to get noticed by everyone and I danced with literally everyone as I was already drunk and I barely know what I was doing, all I remember was me dancing and dancing. The next morning I woke up in a stranger's house. I was in a bed with a stranger naked. I hurry out of bed, put on my clothes, and rush out of the house without wanting to find out the identity of the stranger. I was blank about what had happened the previous night so was my friend Joy when I asked her. I decided to forget about it and just move on with my life.
Three months later I found out that I was pregnant. The news came as a shock to me and I was devastated. I knew it was with that stranger because I have not been sexually active since then. I didn't know where to start or how to begin to narrate to my parent how I was pregnant and don't know who I was pregnant for. My parents will be so disappointed and here I was a graduate with no job or any source of income to take care of the baby. It was a moment of confusion for me but in it, I decided to look for the stranger.
I went back to the school environment and decided to trace the compound I rushed out from but all to no avail, I don't know the guy's name nor can recall the face. I was in this alone, all by myself. The thought of bringing a child into this world with the stigma of no father and not having the resources to cater to the child hit me. So many thoughts came to my mind but I was left with three major options, to keep the child, to abort it, or to give it up for adoption. I was not ready to be a mum or bring a child into this world to suffer, so I made up my mind I was going to give the child up for adoption.
I was due for my NYSC service in a matter of weeks. NYSC is a compulsory one-year program for everywhere graduate in my country. I thought to myself I was going to a different state entirely where no one knows me so it won't be hard to give the baby up for adoption but before I went for my NYSC service I got sick and was taken to the hospital by my parent only for the doctor to discover it was ectopic pregnancy and operation was done for evacuation. My parents got to find out about my pregnancy from the doctors, they were angry and disappointed but they still understood and wish I had told them earlier.
The decision to bring a child into this world should be intentional not something unplanned for. Parenthood will stress and test you beyond your capacity, so it's not something anyone should go into if they are not ready.
This post is an entry to Hive Nigeria community prompt, you can read more about it here. Thank you for your time.
This is a critical situations, you don't even know the father 🙄
Your decision to give the child up for adoption is a good one.
Nice read!
Thank you
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Thank you!!!!
Either one of those choices—abortion, acceptance, and giving it up for adoption—aren't easy ones to make. The thought of abortion or giving it up for adoption are more challenging ones to me.
Unplanned pregnancies should indeed be avoided as much as possible as the repercussions are often intense.
That was quite an experience 😢
I can't imagine how devastated it would have been for you but all the same thank God you make the right decision
Yes
Thank you!
You're welcome