Finally a "Knock at our Door" (Marriage Traditions)

in Ladies of Hive2 months ago

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Finally... something really good!

A knock at the door! This is no ordinary knock, it is a knock that changes a girls life whether for the good or for the bad, but this time it is for the good!

You might be wondering what I've been talking about? Well, a knock at the door means that a guy has come to our house to ask for someone's hand in marriage! Something good huh?

Well my mom is the happiest person on earth, that the opening words of this post were her words of expression, she's the happiest mother on earth for this, she's one of all the African mothers that wants all her children to get married and bare grandchildren!

Keep on reading, I'll tell you what a knock on the door setting looks like in our culture!

The girl and the boy has been dating and the guy finally decides to marry her. First he has to ask the girls parents for permission.

So the first knock is the guy bringing wine to the girls house to let her parents know his intentions. If the girls parents likes him and accepts the wine, it means they are allowed to get married and they both have their blessings!

Then there's a second call, the guys parents will come next with the boy. This happened in my house 👇

The boy wants to marry my elder sister and he came the second time, now with his parents to meet my parents.

Out of excitement, my mom made a lot of preparations to welcome them

To show good hospitality, things like:

  • Garden egg and Ose Oji (the sauce)
  • Alligator pepper
  • Oji
  • Drinks and food has to be present

So my mom bought those things and got them ready

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IMG_20240218_161428_017.jpg Alligator pepper with Oji Igbo

My sister and I also helped my mom to cook a very delicious soup for the visitors, she also bought 6 wraps of FUFU to serve with the soup and she made sure that everything was good-looking and presentable

IMG_20240218_163615_995.jpg Soup

IMG_20240218_163541_491.jpg Fufu

The Fufu was very perfect for that type of food that she made.
She was sure to serve it herself to the visitors.

Since we were not allowed in the sitting room where they entertained the visitors, I didn't hear much what was being discussed but I know that both families really got along!

After eating they presented the drinks and the wine they came with

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Also in conclusion they gave the customary cash required to collect the girl's marriage list.
Marriage list, yes, it is a list of requirements of things the guy needs to buy in order to marry the girl, as well as the Bride price!

The list is usually very much because he has to buy a lot of things, for the girls father, the girls mothers, the youths, the village women, the list goes on...
Proposing to a Nigerian girl is like proposing to the entire village 😂.

They paid a fee of N10,000 (N=Naira is the currency of Nigeria, $1 = N1700), just to get what is written in the paper!

So that was all, the next visit will be to collect the list and see the things they have to buy even before proceeding to the wedding!

It was a happy day, especially for my mom, this is what she has been wishing for, she calls it a light shining upon our family (and does she have to remind me that it will be my turn soon? 🙃🙃🤦‍♀️)!

Before my mom makes any decisions concerning her daughter's marriage, she has to engage her father's people and let them know what is going on, because they say that a child is owned and raised by the whole community not just the mother. So she has to tell the oldest in the family, and there's also where she'll get the marriage lists, it's the same for every girl in the community!

I tell you, my mom went through a lot of trouble just getting those sheets of paper. I'll tell you all about it and everything written on the paper in another post, because it is a long story 😁😁! But it won't be long till I let you know 🙂, it's just a gist for another day!

This is going to be a fun series of post because I'll let you know all the details concerning this marriage and you get to see how everything about a Nigerian Igbo tribe marriage.

Meanwhile, I tell you that I enjoyed dipping my own garden eggs in the sauce and munching them, mmm yummy delicious 😋

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And that soup, was just the best, the best so far my mom has made hehe!

🌺🌼🌺🌼🌺🌼🌺🌼🌺🌼🌺🌼

It was a joyful day for everyone, deep down I knew I have to pray for my sister to have a good marriage so that our happiness might not turn to sorrows in the future!
Pray for her too dear reader...

Ok, you also have to stay tuned for more of this gist, the marriage list is crazy 😂

See you next time! 🤗

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Wow, thanks for sharing this very special occasion with us @madilyn02, my best wishes for the happy new couple!

They are not married yet, soon they'll be after all the rituals are performed. Thank you for your kind words!

You have an interesting tradition :) Congratulations to your sister! Looks like we are going to be reading more about their engagement to their wedding😍

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Yes, there are a lot more to the traditions hehe. I hope to share everything here so you see. Thank you for your kind words!

You sure can :) Hive is where we share almost everything

Hehe yes!

I already wrote the post about the marriage list...you might want to see it.
I want you to see everything about marriage in our tribe lol 🤗🤗
Here:

https://hive.blog/hive-124452/@madilyn02/unveiling-the-marriage-lists-tradition-and-expectations-for-a-nigerian-wedding