When my father was questioned, he just simply said that he is the head of his house. Thus, he is in authority over how he will discipline his children and treat us.
Being the head of the house doesn't give anyone the right to hurt a loved one. Each time that I will be looking at my hands right now as I caress my wife and daughter I am always reminding myself that these hands are meant to nurture and protect. Though it can hurt people outside my kin ( God forbid me to lash out at other people) these hands will only be used for good.
Sometimes our concepts are right but how it was interpreted is twisted.