Hello great friends of hive.
I hope you all are having a great time,
I really wish my day was graceful and blissful as my imaginations but sometimes life happens.
I have been pondering on why most people are always blamed for their reactions towards an action created by someone else.
I went to visit a friend today who has been emotionally down and devastated
and with all the pains poured out through conversations she said
Her spouse had travelled out of town for a week ,he said he had a business meeting,but after few days she found out that he was in town and in a hotel she decided to put a call across to him.
but after the phone call the guy felt that he was insulted by the wife,inlaws came in to address the issues and they told they wife to apologize for speaking harshly to the husband.
But no one questioned the husband why he lied to the wife that he was out of town.
I felt it's the highest level of emotional manipulation and my big question is,
Why do people who hurt us hold unto our negative reaction towards them rather than what triggered us to react the way we did.
I have been in her shoes before
though mine was with a Christian friend
who publicly insulated me, then I kept my distance and I was judge on why I distance myself from a fellow christian and trust me it was emotionally draining.
Imagine being emotionally shattered and also feeling guilty at the same time.
People just blame you for their actions and they feel comfortable about it.
They shift all the attentions from their wrongs and channel it on how bad you reacted and making it look as if it was your fault.
Well in my wild thoughts I have been thinking,
Is it that they have no clue on what they are doing or is it a deliberate action?
why can't they just apologize for their wrongs and the hurts they have caused?
This is gaslighting and it's an emotional abuse especially when you are force to accept being at fault when the truth is that,you ain't.
It's just unfortunate that issues can never be resolved this way and relationship is at stake.
In my case I kept my distance from the person just to protect my peace and my mental health though I tried talking to her about it and she saw nothing wrong with her actions.
I wish people can learn to address or arrest a situation right from it's root instead sweeping things under the carpet.
Being forced to be the one at fault when the handwritings are so glaring it's worth it.
STOP FEELING GUILTY
OVERCOME THE PAIN AND
MOVE ON.
a community encouraging first-hand content, and each individual living their best life.
@thekittygirl thank you very much 🥰