For a few weeks, I’ve been feeling a bit different; honestly, I felt a hollow emptiness in my stomach—a mix of sadness and gratitude. It was a strange situation for me; I didn't want to talk much, nor did I want to overthink things. My only motivation was to give love and attention to my dogs—they mean the world to me; perhaps I’m exaggerating, but I’d do anything for them. Work wasn't going well, and the chaos of daily life was overwhelming. Ultimately, what really broke me was the abandonment of a little dog I had been looking after and trying to protect. What outraged me most was that, despite having a home, he was left to fend for himself. Every night, I asked myself: Why? Why are human beings like this? I include myself in that question, for I am far from perfect, though I strive every day to be a better person—both to myself and to others. It is hard not to feel distressed by everything happening around us; while it is futile to try to be the world's savior, if I have the chance to help even a little—as I did with that dog—I will do it. Perhaps it all stems from the earthquake; maybe I hadn't taken the time to process the difficult emotions from that moment. It is so hard to come to terms with everything happening around us, and we often feel helpless, believing we aren't doing enough. Yet, individually, we can do a little something to transform situations—and even our own hearts. It is tough to realize how such difficult circumstances can change you so profoundly, yet that very vulnerability allows you to see things from a place of deep awareness. If you are going through a similar time, give yourself the space to understand yourself and move forward. I am grateful to God for helping me transform my heart and cultivate love—both for the world around me and for my own soul.
Right now, I look around and feel such gratitude for my husband, my dogs, and my family; for being able to write these lines and listen to the falling rain—which, even though it makes me a bit nervous, is a miracle of nature. There are so many beautiful things; even when your heart or your surroundings aren't exactly pleasant, look for the beauty in the day or within yourself, and always blossom into a better version of who you are.
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That's so sweet, thank you for those final words of encouragement. I hope you feel better soon and can be very happy. I'm so sorry about the little dog; that's so sad.
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Sometimes we need to relax and let things go:
"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."
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