My relationship with my children has grown into something I never expected, something that still amazes me each day. From the moment each of them came into this world, they formed a bond with me that has only grown stronger with time. Now, looking at how close they are to me, and how naturally they gravitate towards me for almost everything, I sometimes sit back and wonder how this connection became so deep.
My eldest son has just started university, and his brother is going to be in his last year of high school. Even though they are at that ages, they still rely on me a lot and like it when I take part in their personal affairs. The girls, on the other hand, are on another level. They have this manner of holding on to me that makes it hard for me to move sometimes, but I really love it. Every night they still sleep across my body as if that is the most natural thing in the world. It has been like that since they were little, and somehow it has turned into part of our family rhythm.
My youngest daughter, who is just ten years old and already in her first level of high school, has had this attachment to me since she was a baby. I used to carry her to bed every night, and even though she has grown, the routine has not completely changed. These days she sometimes falls asleep while reading, and I still wake her gently, guide her to her room, and make sure she is comfortable before I leave. Doing that feels natural to me, almost like a continuation of the bond we built when she was too small to walk.
One thing that has shaped our closeness is the simple fact that I have always been the one taking the children to school and bringing them home. little things kept piling up over those drives to school and back home, and that has been going on for many years now. We talk during those rides, laugh, plan things, argue sometimes, and share stories. Our daily routines were the building blocks of our relationship without me realizing it at that moment. Soon I was the one they came to with everything; schoolwork, projects, minor needs, major needs, and even the emotional side of things.
It's still shocking to me that they hardly ever ask their mom for anything unless I tell them to. If they need something and I am not home, they would rather wait until I return than go to her. It is not because she is unfriendly or distant. Their mom is a good woman, but she is always busy with her shop and usually returns late in the evening. By the time she is available, she is tired, and her interaction with them is mostly centered on chores and responsibilities.
Meanwhile, I return earlier, and I blend work with play when they are around me. Throughout the years, I have used them in the kitchen more than she has, engaged with them more often, and spent long hours with them during the weekends. It is a fact that Sundays are always noisy, energetic, and full of laughter with the children while she stays quiet, doing her own things.
Our home dynamic is not based on any rule or expectation, it just happened to be this way. And even though I sometimes question the reason why the children relate to me more than they do to their mom, I feel fortunate every day to have such a bond with them. It is personal, real, and means a lot to me deeply.
Spanish
La relación única que comparto con mis hijos
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Mi relación con mis hijos se ha convertido en algo que jamás imaginé, algo que aún me asombra cada día. Desde el momento en que cada uno llegó a este mundo, formaron un vínculo conmigo que no ha hecho más que fortalecerse con el tiempo. Ahora, al ver lo unidos que están a mí y cómo recurren a mí de forma natural para casi todo, a veces me detengo a reflexionar sobre cómo esta conexión se volvió tan profunda.
Mi hijo mayor acaba de empezar la universidad y su hermano está cursando el último año de bachillerato. A pesar de su edad, todavía dependen mucho de mí y les gusta que participe en sus asuntos personales. Las chicas, en cambio, son un caso aparte. Tienen esa forma de aferrarse a mí que a veces me dificulta moverme, pero me encanta. Todas las noches siguen durmiendo sobre mí como si fuera lo más natural del mundo. Ha sido así desde que eran pequeñas, y de alguna manera se ha convertido en parte de nuestra rutina familiar.
Mi hija menor, que tiene solo diez años y ya está en primero de secundaria, ha estado muy apegada a mí desde que era bebé. Solía llevarla en brazos a la cama todas las noches, y aunque ha crecido, la rutina no ha cambiado del todo. Hoy en día, a veces se queda dormida mientras lee, y todavía la despierto con suavidad, la acompaño a su habitación y me aseguro de que esté cómoda antes de irme. Hacerlo me resulta natural, casi como una continuación del vínculo que creamos cuando era demasiado pequeña para caminar.
Algo que ha moldeado nuestra cercanía es el simple hecho de que siempre he sido yo quien lleva a los niños al colegio y los trae de vuelta a casa. Pequeñas cosas se iban acumulando durante esos trayectos, y así ha sido durante muchos años. Hablamos durante esos viajes, reímos, hacemos planes, a veces discutimos y compartimos historias. Nuestras rutinas diarias fueron la base de nuestra relación, sin que yo me diera cuenta en ese momento. Pronto, yo era a quien acudían para todo: tareas escolares, proyectos, necesidades pequeñas, necesidades grandes e incluso los aspectos emocionales.
Todavía me sorprende que casi nunca le pidan nada a su madre a menos que yo se lo diga. Si necesitan algo y no estoy en casa, prefieren esperar a que vuelva antes que ir a verla. No es porque sea antipática o distante. Su madre es una buena mujer, pero siempre está ocupada con su tienda y suele llegar tarde por la noche. Cuando por fin está disponible, está cansada y su interacción con ellos se centra principalmente en las tareas y responsabilidades.
Mientras tanto, yo llego antes y combino el trabajo con el juego cuando están conmigo. A lo largo de los años, los he utilizado más en la cocina que ella, he interactuado con ellos con mayor frecuencia y he pasado largas horas con ellos los fines de semana. Es un hecho que los domingos siempre son ruidosos, llenos de energía y risas con los niños, mientras ella permanece tranquila, haciendo sus cosas.
La dinámica de nuestro hogar no se basa en ninguna regla ni expectativa; simplemente se dio así. Y aunque a veces me pregunto por qué los niños se identifican más conmigo que con su madre, me siento afortunada cada día de tener un vínculo tan fuerte con ellos. Es algo personal, real y significa mucho para mí, profundamente.
It's beautiful to have such a bond with your children. Such relationships are common between mothers and their children, but you happen to do a fine work here. Bravo 👏
Thank you for the upvotes, I appreciate it.