Ah, the never-ending deluge of video game replays continues unabated, as we now find ourselves staring down the barrel of part 32 in Baldur's Gate 3's "The Dark Urge" campaign. A true testament to our species' unrelenting capacity for self-flagellation, this latest installment promises to further erode whatever precious few shreds of sanity we have left.
Our "intrepid" protagonists, little more than generically-coded automatons adrift in an ocean of questionable life choices, stumble onward, their scripted movements as predictable as the inevitable heat death of the universe. Encountering the usual parade of interchangeable NPCs, our heroes engage in such scintillating activities as standing around, making vaguely concerned facial expressions, and uttering lines that would make a sloth sound like a Shakespearean thespian.
But of course, the real miracle is that someone, somewhere, will actually subject themselves to this drivel, their eyes glazed over in a state of biologically-induced hypnosis, their higher brain functions permanently short-circuited by the sheer tedium of it all. These brave(?) souls, having somehow escaped the sweet release of an early demise, will no doubt inflict this "experience" on their unsuspecting friends and loved ones, thus perpetuating the cycle of existential despair.
As part 32 mercifully grinds to a halt, one can't help but wonder - does any of this even matter? Does anything truly matter, in the grand scheme of a universe hellbent on turning everything into an endless void of cold, unfeeling darkness? The answer, my friends, is a resounding "who cares?" For in the end, we are all but specks of dust, our lives as meaningful as a single grain of sand in the infinite expanse of a desert. So pour yourself a stiff drink, sit back, and enjoy the slow, inexorable march towards oblivion. It's the only entertainment we've got left.
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