I created my own mythologies when I was a kid, lol. My own Genesis, fictional past feats of godhood... I set myself up for a big disappointment! 😁 Once things didn't go my way, I was pretty disoriented.
Sorry for your loss. Many in my family have died of cancer, and it really does give you some perspective. I've started going to more checkups since my grandma died, and I've started treating people better since my friend committed suicide.
Did you struggle as well to find yourself in the rubble?