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!LOLZ
!BBH

I really want to buy one of those grocery checkout dividers
But the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back.

Credit: marshmellowman
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!LOLZ

What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
Outlaws are wanted.

Credit: lofone
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(8/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ

Moses was the first person
to use Control-C as a shortcut.

Credit: marshmellowman
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!LOLZ
!BBH

How do you look for Will Smith in the snow?
Just follow the fresh prints.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Where do elephants hide?
They paint their toenails red and hide in strawberry patches!

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ

A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class.
It was a weapon of math disruption.

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(8/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

My girlfriend told me to stop singing Wonderwall to her
I said mayybeee...

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

Want a new friend?
Tell a women you love her.

Credit: reddit
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(3/10)
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!LOLZ

Why did the chicken climb on top of the house?
He was a Roofster.

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(6/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ
!BBH

What do mummies do on vacation?
They unwind.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

I could get in trouble for stealing from the kitchen supply store
But that’s a whisk I’m willing to take.

Credit: reddit
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!LOLZ

Did you hear about the guy who threw his alarm clock while hosting a party?
He wanted to see if time flys while having fun.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Why are vacuums always so tough?
Because they know how to suck it up.

Credit: reddit
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(8/10)
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!LOLZ

If you ever get the chance to go to India
You have to try their New Delhi

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?
“Odor in the court!”

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(8/10)
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!LOLZ

What do whales like to eat?
Fish and ships.

Credit: boboman
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!LOLZ

What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?
“Odor in the court!”

Credit: reddit
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(8/10)

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Why doesn't Voldemort have glasses?
Nobody nose.

Credit: mimismartypants
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!LOLZ

I really love video games where you go for an deep sea adventuring.
They're just so immersive.

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

To err is human.
To arrrgh is pirate.

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(7/10)
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!LOLZ

Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get his teeth crowned.

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!LOLZ

Why is a timer like a scale?
They both measure wait.

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!LOLZ

I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places.
He told me to stop going to those places.

Credit: benthomaswwd
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(4/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ
!BBH

I went to the doctors to see him about my memory loss.
But I forgot to mention it to him.

Credit: reddit
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!LOLZ

A book just fell on my head.
I only have my shelf to blame.

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

Apparently to start a zoo you need at least 2 pandas a grizzy and 3 polars.
It’s the bear minimum.

Credit: reddit
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!LOLZ
!BBH

I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism.

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(4/10)

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!LOLZ

I tried to starte a professional hide and seek team but it didn't work out.
Turns out good players are hard to find.

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(3/10)

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Have you heard about the Angel of Death that’s not so intelligent?
The Dim Reaper?

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(8/10)
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!LOLZ

Have you heard about the Angel of Death that’s not so intelligent?
The Dim Reaper?

Credit: reddit
@elplatagames, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of efmm

(4/10)
Delegate Hive Tokens to Farm $LOLZ and earn 110% Rewards. Learn more.

!LOLZ
!BBH

Throwing acid is wrong
in some people’s eyes.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

I went to a really emotional wedding the other day.
Even the cake was in tiers.

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!LOLZ

What do you call a hospital for horses?
A horse-pital.

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(4/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

Why did the chicken climb on top of the house?
He was a Roofster.

Credit: reddit
@elplatagames, I sent you an $LOLZ on behalf of efmm

(7/10)
NEW: Join LOLZ's Daily Earn and Burn Contest and win $LOLZ

!LOLZ

If I don’t perfect human cloning
I won’t be able to live with myself.

Credit: marshmellowman
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(3/10)
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!LOLZ
!BBH

What did the mayonnaise say to the icebox?
Close the door, I am dressing.

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!LOLZ

What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
Outlaws are wanted.

Credit: lofone
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(4/10)

PLAY & EARN $DOOM

!LOLZ
!BBH

I invented a new word today.
Plagiarism.

Credit: reddit
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(8/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
Click to delegate: 10 - 20 - 50 - 100 HP

!LOLZ
!BBH

What do you call a dead magician?
An abra-cadaver.

Credit: marshmellowman
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(4/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ

What is a ghosts favorite candy?
Boo boo clusters.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Me and my mates are in a band called Duvet.
We're a cover band.

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(4/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ

I'm in hospital because I drunk a cup of petrol.
That was a very fuelish thing to do.

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!LOLZ

Why did the farmer dress his pig in an apron?
Pretty soon he would be bacon.

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!LOLZ
!BBH

Where did Phil Collins record all his songs?
In the Stu-Stu-Studio

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(4/10)
Farm LOLZ tokens when you Delegate Hive or Hive Tokens.
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!LOLZ

I always try to use the word mucho around my Spanish-speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.

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