For the longest time, I've been feeling content and grateful for everything that I have. And maybe that's because I've stayed away from most people. I've stayed away from social media (which is "most people"). I never had to feel the FOMO. Honestly it can be lonely at times especially when you realize that most people won't even contact you using other communication channels available. That's when I found out I don't really have that many "real friends" and that's okay. The universe was so unforgiving that it even took away my one very real friend in life. So lately, I started going out and joining activities in order to heal and have a bit of human connection. But as always, it was only good at the beginning, I retreated back to my cave again. I guess it is just my expectations. I expected people to accept me for being me and to never question my choices. But most people are not like that, shocking lol.
As I slowly rejoined the world, FOMO creeps back into my life. I know I should be in control of my feelings but it's undeniable that these people that I've met have their special way of making me feel that I lack something. This is their way of validating that their choices are better and that I should be like them too. See, this is exactly why I'm getting get out of this town next month because I feel like I've become too limited in terms of who I socialize with. I'm stuck with the same kind of crowd.
I did everything. I tried to be open-minded for the sake of "human connection" but then you know there are always trade-offs. It only made me sadder. I've been encountering people who seem to find joy in asking my status and my future plans in life. To be honest, I've never seen random people so concerned about me not being married yet or not having kids. Gosh, my life choices seem to be affecting these people so much lol.
Is it that time to be bombarded with all of these nagging questions? Is it just the people I choose to surround myself with or worse, is it just patriarchy? Hell, I even met men who were so concerned about me getting old as if they will be responsible for taking care of me someday. Ugh, the pain of an ageing independent woman lol. I wish there's a way to evade these people. Now I feel like I don't belong in this culture at all.
I do ME and you do YOU.
If you're a girlboss, society pressures you to become a housewife. If you're a housewife, society pressures you to become a girlboss. Whatever you do, nothing will ever be right. It's like "I'm a housewife" and you should be too so I can validate that I made the right choices in life. The same goes with the girlboss narrative. It's really just this constant need for validation through others. In my humble opinion, there's nothing wrong with being independent or being a stay-at-home mom, everyone has their own significant roles. I respect people's choices in life. Never did I ask or pressure my friends or anyone to travel like I did or to live life on their own terms or to be like me. But I see people can't do the same to me. Anyway, we are all different. I respect your choices in life. As long as it works for you and you're content, then there's no need to explain yourself.
Easier said than done. Lately I found myself explaining to people why I am what I am. This is why the long forgotten FOMO's making its comeback. This is exactly why I don't go out of my way to meet people especially those I absolutely having nothing in common with. My inner peace gets disturbed.
So yeah I've decided to stop these activities that I've been participating in lately. I'd be doing stuff on my own until I move out next month. Knowing that I'm leaving soon makes everything easier to handle. Makes me ignore insecure people around. It's a great thing to look forward to something. To have this feeling of going away and leaving it all behind. To have hope that things will get better and things will change. When I'm the city, there are way more opportunities to be with those with similar mindset. We have civilization for a reason. I'm starting a new life.
I need to go back to the JOMO though. The joy of missing out. The opposite of missing out. I have everything that I need in my life at this moment, nothing is lacking (I guess that's bad news for everyone lol). I don't need to keep up with what the housewives have, or what the girlbosses have, I'm enough. And I have enough. I would devote my remaining days in my current location to focus on enjoying some activities on my own and be thankful for all the blessings that I have in my life.
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Hello, my friend. As I look through your post, I see someone that's suggesting focusing on what matters most... our own well-being. There are plenty of people out there, who would love n nothing more than to change people. Into what... I don't know. But like you have said in your post:
That's like turning a frown, upside down! Certainly fits into my #thoughtfuldailypost vibe; taking a not-so-positive situation, and making it better. But I have to ask you something...
Firstly... It's none of my business, but I see you have been on the blockchain for quite some time. I also see that you are Powering Down... I hope this isn't due to the topic you've shared with us. Also... I always suggest that everyone shares the type of camera or smartphone, that they use to take their photographs. This way, you are taking ownership of your content! No one can question if you took the photos, or chase after you with the bad old "plagiarism" flag. I hope you know I say these things with the utmost respect... I tell this to everyone! Not just folks who use my TAG. Before I let you go... I would love to know how you found out about my TAG. Certainly hope to hear back from you!
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