Changing The Changed Child
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There is a quote I grew up knowing from my mom, "You gave birth to a child, you didn't give him/her life." I used to feel bad anytime she said a thing like that until I got to understand it for myself.
Life is all about choices, we can only suggest but we can't decide for anyone. It was not long before I realized that most of the teachings and the training we were given when we were kids, were not choices for us but a clue on the kind of choices we are expected to make, and if along the line we chose to deviate from those teachings our parents would only lament and keep wishing we get back to those ways.
I have seen parents who are religious leaders, who took their time to groom their children well, but the children when they go outside, do contrary to what their parents taught them from home.
No matter how much a parent trains a child, it's not a guarantee that the child will grow up to choose that path. Sometimes it works but most times it doesn't. Choice is a personal thing, we can't make it even for our children.
Parents train their children, imbibing good morals into them in order for them not to lack a good option already waiting for them when they are faced with the issue of making a choice in life.
What will I do if the child chooses to neglect my option?
The truth is no parent won't be sad when they labored so much trying to bring up a child in a certain way only for the child to grow and decide to go the opposite direction.
Personally, I would be so bittered especially if the way the child wants to go is bad but making choices in life is inevitable so I would take it slow with the child.
As humans, things like that can make us despise the child or even discard that very child but to what end? What I will do instead is give that child more of my attention and more love while I keep praying for change.
When I notice that the child's heart is ready, I'll start living by example in the area I am trying to preach to the child, then start educating the child on the dangers of whatever he or she is into.
It also depends on the age of the child, there is an age that you can correct using force(cane) and love and there is the one that just loves and living an exemplary lifestyle will do.
I will never argue, drag, or force the child to undo their choice instantly, they have the right to choose afterward, instead, I'll take it slow and allow them to come back to their right mind, because if what you taught them is the right thing, they will surely return to it even if they run for years.
Deviating from parental advice often happens with children, once they grow up they take their own paths, sometimes the worst.
#dreemerforlife
That is the truth mate, sometimes we just pray and hand them over to God.
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Thank you
That quote you grew up with says it all, we cannot always decide the path the kids choose.
That's is it boss, parents can only play their part, but the decision is left for the child
I agree with your mom, giving birth to the child doesn't give him life.. At the end, i think only a few parent will realize that they're just care takers and the ability of a child is left in the hands of same child.
Hmm, you have a point here, parents are only care takers, they can only provide an alternative but can't decide for their children. Thanks for reading ma