Nobody really wants to talks about how hard growing can be so as not to instill fears in others.But like every could see or to say, “You’ve changed,” like it’s a bad thing. But they don’t see the nights you stayed up overthinking make all effort of good and beautiful things, or the quiet battles you fought in your own mind just to become better.
The truth is mostly like why growth isn’t always pretty? Sometimes it may feels like you’re breaking apart piece by piece. You start losing people, even those you don't expect your habits, even parts of yourself that once made you feel comfortable. And it hurts, because you don’t recognize who you are anymore.
I remember a time when I felt stuck between who I used to be and who I was becoming. That part is a difficult situation for I was learning to say no without regret, to set boundaries, to stop explaining myself all the time. But somehow, people started saying you've changed. They may not understand that I wasn’t trying to be different I was just trying to survive in a way that didn’t destroy me anymore.
It’s strange how people celebrate growth until it makes them uncomfortable.
You stop tolerating certain things, and suddenly, you’re “acting different.” and they keep complaining,
You stop chasing people, and now you’re “cold.”
You start choosing peace, and they say you’ve “distanced yourself.” nothing you could do to please them.
But what they don’t see is growth sometimes means outgrowing things you once loved. It means realizing that not everything or everyone fits in your new season style. It may means missing your old life and habits while trying to move on to the new you. Sometimes, I sit and think about the person I used to be always trying to please, always afraid of being misunderstood. And even though I miss parts of that person, I know I can’t go back. Because the truth is, you can’t grow and stay the same at the same time.
Growth feels lonely sometimes. It feels confusing. But it’s also the most honest thing you’ll ever do for yourself.
So if you’re changing right now and it feels like you’re losing yourself maybe you’re not losing you. Maybe you’re just finding the parts that were hidden underneath everything you outgrew.
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