Hello my friend,
I think perhaps my perspective on those who have passed may be in part due to my upbringing. Every night my mother would pray with us for those who were no longer with us. She was Sicilian (descendant of immigrants), and in her tradition the dead are always with us, always remembered. Maybe I'm overthinking it :) You can't reason with the heart.
As for joy...my granddaughter is home for Christmas. I've bought so many lights for the front of the house that it looks like something out of Times Square. I think sometimes of the Jewish toast, l'chaim: those who have gone are always with me, and yet I turn my face to life. It is what we have and we should enjoy it.
You are so kind, so bright. It's a pleasure to read you. And this, "It may be checked for social media for the last five years as it lands on your soil though" gave me a really solid chuckle.
What can we do in face of it all, but smile.
Have the most wonderful holiday season and may only good memories stay with you.
How bloody great are grandchildren! I only have one and that'll be the one and only but oh! My heart lights up like your Christmas house when I see him. Enjoy your Christmas!