I cannot comment at the ecency.com site, but thank you @wandrnrose7 for your freewrite, and my heart goes out to you. You escaped an abusive situation, while others before you ended in suicide or substance abuse.
I kept my own sensibilities because I am kept by One who is greater than all. Heartbreak and suffering are inevitable to the human condition. Never think for a moment that there aren’t other paths to choose than what appears to you as the most obvious or easiest choice, or that choice which your mind suggests as most logical to you.