One day, a duck decided that he wanted to speak English. He was tired of the quack, quack and even more quacking that he was hearing all day.
But, to learn English, he needed to hear well spoken English on a frequent basis.
As he really didn't know anyone who fits this criteria, he decided to buy a TV. He thought that by watching regular TV programmes, he would soon master the art of the English language.
He took his TV home and plugged it in.
However, he could not receive a picture of any kind.
He went back to the shop.
“Have you tried using an aerial?”
“Quack,” replied the duck
“Here's one that would work. Just £5.”
“Quack,” replied the duck. It is always good to show appreciation.
The duck went back home and tried the TV again. He plugged in the aerial. There were still ants on the TV, but they were becoming more colourful.
“Quack,” thought the duck, as he decided to twiddle with the auto tuning switch.
He waited.
“Quack!” shouted the duck
He waited more, until
“I've got some fucking TV at last.”
He sat and watched the TV. He tried BBC1. There was news. Not very cheerful.
He tried BBC2. Cooking show. Roast Duck.
He tried ITV1. A quiz show.
He carried on watching TV for a whole week.
He decided to go back to the TV shop to thank the shop assistant for all of his help.
“Thank you,” said the duck.
“Quack,” replied the shop assistant.