WHAT I WANTED TO BE VS. WHAT I AM NOW

in Freewriters2 years ago (edited)


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They say when life throws lemons at you, make lemonades, yeah? That’s exactly what I have been doing. Before I go further, I’d like to ask. What did you want to become, and what are you now?

I was one funny child. Growing up, I think I must have had up to 10 different career paths if not more. Luckily for me, that ended up being narrowed down to just 5. I am no longer the confused kid I was, but I am still trying to find a balance.

If you are from a typical Nigerian home, it’s almost impossible for your parents to not want a say in what you become in the future. My older sister always wanted to be a doctor from when she could say her first words, but, I wanted to be it all; a teacher, a lawyer, an actress, etc.

Growing up, I had a firm passion for teaching. Hence, I’d gather the neighbours' children under this really massive orange tree in our compound and teach them. I invited a few of my friends to join in as tutors as well.

The parents would pay a certain fee daily. I think the crazier part of this was we told the little children to take (NOT STEAL- we were very clear about this) chalk from their schools so we'd never run out of chalk. I think I was around 12 years old at the time.

To say I enjoyed teaching would be an understatement. I was in love with it. I even taught in a number of schools in-between holidays when I was in the University. I also taught in church (children's class).

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I had concluded from when I was really young that my purpose was to teach. The long-term goal at the time was to own a school in the future. I was going to name it ‘BRAINIACS ACADEMY”.

From the first day I learned the word brainiacs, I decided it would be the school’s name because I wanted to raise kids or students under the best of academic conditions. I had even designed a uniform, the pattern, and colours in my head.

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When I was about 14, I decided I wanted to be a lawyer too. The plan then changed to me being a lawyer who owned a school and I’d employ good teachers. Somehow, I outgrew that, or should I say life happened.

At the time, my reason for wanting to be a lawyer stemmed from my admiration for the beautiful female lawyers I had seen on television. I thought them smart, bold, courageous, and just extraordinary. The wigs! They drove me crazy, in a good way of course.

I pictured myself in a robe, defending a client and repeatedly saying ‘My Lord, May I If I May’ in a court of law. I had even acted these scenes in my head.

Don’t even get me started on how I wanted to be an actress too, but my dad wouldn’t hear of it. At the time, my dad had terrible opinions about Nollywood that he forbade me to ever speak of it.

I believe the whole problem started when my dad started the “No daughter of mine would go to Art class”. He said your sister would study to become a MEDICAL DOCTOR, and you would be a CHEMICAL ENGINEER. I looked him in the eye and said, “No dad, my life, my choices”.

If you’re Nigerian you’ll know that what follows challenging your parents is a dirty slap. My dad threatened to disown me(now, he jokes about it, says he only tried to scare me) if I didn’t go to science class instead. Truth be told, the stubborn me didn’t exactly care at the time.

The only reason I finally opted for science class was my mum. So, I went to science class with anger and bitterness in my heart. Don't get me wrong, I didn’t fail at all, I actually excelled in all my courses but one.

I was an average student in Chemistry until this really handsome, young, and well-built man was employed to teach Chemistry. I'll never say this to Mr. Seun, lol, but he was the reason I took Chemistry as seriously as I ended up doing. I wanted him to notice me by my grades and boy, did he.

It dawned on me how clueless I was regarding a career path when we were asked in SS3 to write about what we wanted to study in the University, and why we chose the said course. We were given two weeks to submit.

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After a lot of back and forth, my aunt decided nursing would be best for me because I was full of potentials, was caring, empathetic and patient. There and then, it was decided. So, I wrote an essay on why I wanted to be a nurse. I wasn't sure what I wanted, I just flowed with what my family chose for me.

Long story short, I applied to study Nursing at a state university here in Nigeria, but I ended up with Industrial Chemistry. I sincerely hope that this act of denying or changing a student's chosen course by some State or Federal Universities is completely curbed.

So, there I was, studying Industrial Chemistry when I wanted Nursing-well not technically, but you get the gist.

When I was in 300 level in University, my dad apologized and asked if I could start afresh and go study law or whatever I truly wanted, but I told him I couldn't. I felt it was too late but now, I kinda wish I did.

Now, I’m the industrial chemist who really wanted to be a teacher, an actress, an on-air personality, a lawyer, and a nurse. Instead, I have worked in a media agency, an eCommerce organization, now in the hospitality industry. So when I tell you confusion set in from the minute I was asked to choose the science department, you see what I mean, yeah?

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Here I am, still trying to navigate through life, still trying to decide what I really want to do.

Again, I ask: What did you want to be when you grew up?

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Nigerian parents and their drama.
If there's one thing I've actually learnt?
No one knows what's best, they just give opinions with fear and then make it certain.

Well, an interesting story and how glad you've evolved to be where you are now.

Wanted to be an automobile engineer but e no dey Naija, ended up being electrical/electronics engineer.
I'm going back to my cars anyway I have been a mechanic and would pursue my car dreams...

Thanks for sharing and bringing this to mind.

Apologies for the late reply. Basically, our parents just want the best for us, so they tend to impose their choices on us believing that they know better. Going back back pursuing your car dreams is a brilliant thing to do. All the best!

Thank you for stopping by.

I am enthralled by this write up. It was as if the piece was talking to me telepathically. Well, my story took the same trajectory as yours; i guess i would attribute mine to the evergreen parlance "life happens". From nursing the desire to be an engineer; aeronautic to be précise, to being an actor, to being a well renowned entrepreneur. I had a whole bunch of them, but i narrowed down to these three. Today, i am a geographer, teacher and an aspiring M.Sc student in the same field. Most times, parents are major influencers on our career choices, citing their ever long precedented desire for us to select a lucrative job due to the job scarcity predicament of the nation, deeming other courses in the process. On the other side of it, life is the key influencer; which has derailed the career choices of many.

Knowing that this piece was relatable to what you've experienced, or had to deal with is everything. In all, I'm so happy that you have successfully narrowed your several choices to just a few. I'm still struggling, but I hope that I can figure it out with time.
Thank you for your comment.

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