The Demons Within
When does it begin? And for how long will they remain?
The demons within.
We walk into the world and slowly we begin to carry their baggage.
They haunt us, attack us, or is it us? Are we to blame?
The demons within.
I tried to explain to her that I could almost see clear of this bad feeling, almost.
But I never could truly see clear of them.
She smiled at me, because I was naive? Or maybe she identified? Or maybe she thought I was amusing?
The demons within.
They do drive us in strange and unfortunate directions. We say the things we shouldn't have. And do things that we will feel awful about later—but at the time we are compelled to do them.
So many scars from the past and so many dark places in dark times.
The demons within.
I got clear of many of them, but I had help and it took work. It took a skilled helper. It took time and dedication. It was painful and yet it so insightful. You were awed at what you learned about yourself.
And what you learned about those demons and where they came from and what they were up to.
That agenda you couldn't break free from unless you unlocked your cell door and walked out.
And left them behind.
The demons within.
It's different now. After I was helped out of my barred prison of conditioning. That armored world which holds you tight in its straight-jacket.
Oh I still get haunted, toyed with by a few each day, but they don't have the same hold on me and if they try to assert their former grip-- I put my foot down and say:
“Get back in your corner! I won't play your game anymore. I won't attack myself. I won't give myself another beating. I won't play the bad little boy role.”
I will cordon off, you dirty demon and you will starve from an emotional fast. You will shrivel up and wane away. It's still work. But at least you know what's going on and how to stop it.
Believe me. If you beat up yourself, you'll beat up others. If you learn compassion for yourself, you'll learn compassion for others. You'll stand a good chance, a very good chance of winning against them.
Against, the demons within.