When I look in the mirror,
All I see is myself and vanity,
The two are embedded in one.
Because with each long, yet quick stare,
All I see is an amplified version of myself,
Or rather, what I want to see.
The vanity lies not in my garment or my look,
But it goes way deeper into my soul—
A hunger for unachievable perfection,
A dysfunctional state of mind,
Palpable to no one but me,
Crafted into the theory of betterment,
Sweet-talked as success.
As palatable as it seems,
The echoes of "vain, vain, vain"
Dominate my night, directing my dreams.
And with each nightmare, I'm burdened with how weak I am,
How life can slip away
At the moment of my vulnerability.
All I can do is muster a few words,
Not the courage I wear in the day.
But perhaps in the silence, I'll find
A truth that's been hiding behind
The masks I wear, the roles I play,
An authentic self, come what may.
And maybe then, I'll learn to see
Beyond the vanity, wild and free,
A soul that's mine, yet not defined
By the expectations that I've aligned.
In this quiet space, I'll find my way
To self-acceptance, day by day.
Lovely piece. We all have to unmask the structures that we or even society places in order to see and accept ourselves; building something real as a proof of self-love.