you used the two-line stanza to make the moment of realization stand out, and at the same time create that sense of realization for the reader, the pause when something comes with clarity to our consciousness.
You got it 100% Cliff, and although it often jars on my introverts soul to give myself props 😂 I did feel like I'd hit on the nail on the head with this poem. I think it is hard to describe internal thought processes, feelings and those strange moments when existence is brought into sharp focus (the feeling of Sonder) without reverting to cliché words like 'love' 'fear' etc.
There is something, very slight, that hearkens back to "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock." Maybe just the journey along the city street.
This is high praise indeed and honestly makes me realize this is one of my better poems. I just re-read 'The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock' for the first time in many years and I can see what you're saying, that poem does describe a kind of journey, like he's walking down a street unseen observing the sublime and absurd in equanimity.
As I was saying to agmoore in the comment above, this poem describes exactly how I view the world when one of my strange episodes overcomes me. It has a trippy feel, maybe it's all just a case of one too many dalliances with Shrooms of the magical variety as a youngster 😂
Thanks for your comment @cliffagreen, and for inspiring me to read a poem I haven't read in over 20 years.