Having Fun — Hive

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"I have paid over 2 grand for this holiday to Mosney so you better have fun," said my dad while shaking a threatening fist at us just when I started moaning after we parked up in an Irish holiday resort on the outskirts of Dublin.

I looked at my sister and there was never as much pressure to have fun in all our lives. So we went straight to the arcade to look for some fun to be had. There at the end of the Arcade was a Simpsons arcade game. It glowed as if to call me. My sister who possessed the coinage gave me a shiny 20p to play. I selected Bart who had a skateboard as his weapon, Marge had a vacuum cleaner , Lisa , a skipping rope, Maggie had a passifier and Homer either his fists or a burp I can recall. Every level had a mini boss which would be the characters like Barney with his poisonous burp or Krusty. The final boss was obviously Mr Burns preceded by Smithers.

Source

The young boy about a year my junior was getting slaughtered by the normal goons that were approaching at speed. Every time he lost 3 lives it was game over for him so he put his hand into his underpants and took out another 20p piece. He kept losing and he kept putting his hands down the pants for the 20p's. His underpants must have been some weight walking into the arcade. I was going through in my mind how he filled up his stash at the start. Did he have a special compartment for the 20p coins. What if one of them slipped up the wrong slot thinking it was a Simpsons arcade game. Could you get metal poisoning for a 20p stuck up your jacksie??

It wasn't bothering him in the slightest so he must have had a good clench going for that not to happen but yet he kept on losing and 20p kept coming from his jocks. I was only 8 at the time and it was the first time I realised that handling money coins would carry germs, poo germs in this case from the 20p's rolling around in the little lads skiddy jocks. Surely the owners of the arcade were aware what the little had was doing and used the relevant PPE to acquire the coins from the arcade game. Not long later his mother came to whisk him away. She put some Euro notes she won down her bra. What is it with this family? Jeez Louise.

This is fun though, this Simpsons game. I was having fun. The fathers 2k didn't go to waste. Where the bloody hell were the parents anyway??
In the pub of course. They were having great fun, with all the Dubs singing old Irish ballads. 2k well spent here as well. When we went back to our parent we were filled up with crisps (Tayto which are heavenly)and orange of. course. 20p boy was nearby on the coke, Cola Cola that is. The Guinness was flowing with the adults and everyone looked like they were having a great time. It was the only time that kids in Ireland were given an endless supply of Taytos. Boozing adults keeping kids quiet.

We had swimming booked for the next day. Water slides and back to the Simpsons video game. What a life. Father was dying with a hangover trying to pretend he was felt great. Pretending he was having fun. Dying the most unfortunate death having drank q few neat vodkas with his new friends the night before.

Splashing him actually made him feel better I think. The irony of it all. He was mad to give me a shit load of 20p's today to get rid of me after the pool.

"Cmon sis, we have a date with underpants boy."

I nominate @funbobby510 and @hilariousdorian to take part in the comtest.