My Special Queen

in Comedy Open Mic6 months ago

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gif from tenor

We all have that particular person in our lives that we can't seem to help liking even when it's glaring that they're not suitable for the long term. That's my story with queen, a very beautiful and quite saucy lady who sees the worst in most, even when she's the vessel of annoyance and stupidity.

Queen used to be a dark skin, melanin lady when we were growing up, but as she saw that her brain wasn't as bright, she decided to compensate for that with her skin. She's so bleached that nowadays when she walks by, all we see is just a fairly stupid and confident person.

Queen is a very nice soul, when sense isn't a priority or prerequisite and you let her get close. That's why I usually let my brain go on vacation whenever we're together. Once we had a situation. She makes braids and while we were talking, I told her that I'm a breadwinner. Immediately she heard that, she kept pestering me to sit between her legs.

I resisted, but she just wouldn't let it go, so I eventually caved in. When I got my head in between her legs, she was visibly disappointed with the experience, not because I did not give her a good head though, but because I was bald.

When I raised my head to face her, it was obvious that she was pumped up. Her chest was heaving heavily. So I asked when she became asthmatic because her chest looked like a reservoir of rubbish and she could not exhale (excel) in real life.

Being who she is, she chased me across the street only to stop abruptly in front of one dude's house. I was surprised and walked back to her - as she stood there looking like the sun had just risen in front of the guy's house - to find out what happened. Her reply was that she was feeling bad for the guy.

When I asked why, she said it's because they were throwing a party at his house which he wasn't going to attend because ugly people will not be allowed inside. Well, I felt bad for him too because when I saw him, he looked like a chimpanzee had mated with a dwraf and he was the unfortunate product.

But Queen isn't just averse to her kind (stupid people), she's also averse to fat people. That's because every fat guy she's been with has always had what she calls "a pencil D". When she eventually came across one with a good D, he had 'no sense' in her words. She kept wondering why his sense couldn't just match at least half his body size.

I know I said that Queen isn't to fool of sense either, but I totally understand her view point, because, for a stupid person to know that you're stupid, then it means that the dude might be having his brain beneath his feat and all that weight isn't doing it any good.

If you think that's bad, imagine this other dude she met and came to tell me that his feet are so big that it sounds like he's beat boxing when he walks. Yes, my friend Queen is a savage, she probably should've been born in the forager times.

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Bleaching is something I do not like to see, and to be precise, that kind of fashioned is not good at all, I know people like Queen consider it to be fashion, can you gist me more about the head you give, do you smile after it?.

can you gist me more about the head you give, do you smile after it?.

😂😂

I give a very good head, because I'm very knowledgeable. And yes I always

I admire your knowledge 😅

Lol, I just wonder how people find bleaching so sweet. I just which they could just stay in the sun for some minutes and then smell their body to see what they look like. Nice storyline friend you really entertained me

Hahahaha so funny. Bleaching is dangerous to the skin and health. Tell your queen to behave like her name.

I guess not all queens are really queens

It's the way you finished this queen lady for me 😂 she must be really something to behold hehe 😀

but as she saw that her brain wasn't as bright, she decided to compensate for that with her skin 😂

It's the way you finished this queen lady for me 😂 she must be really something to behold hehe 😀

but as she saw that her brain wasn't as bright, she decided to compensate for that with her skin 😂

You always dispose your brain when you are with a whole QUEEN. That's pinchy. And as for the head, I'm very confused sir. Please, enlighten me.

Well... Why burden my head with something I won't need when I'm with her.

As for the head, I guess people who braid don't like bald people, no matter how good a head you give😜