Hark to me, people, and now hear me do,
I've lost a dear friend: the letter ๐.
Yes indeed, yo๐ listened me correct,
This is worst at best, and everything is wrecked.
For I awoke to-day to q๐ite a big frightโ
My tr๐sty ol' typer-thing wasn't typing right!
All the pretty letters were working, save ๐.
Down a whole vowel; my worst dreams were tr๐e!
So "Blast!" I cried. "What crime be this?
If I'm witho๐t ๐, then I can't do j๐stice
To my day job as a writer,
Or my night life as a fighter
Of everything online that's ๐gly and sad.
I cannot tell a lieโthis is really, really bad!"
So I laid myself down on the gro๐nd for a while,
And I wept for ๐ there in tra๐matized style.
I h๐rt for ๐; yes, I missed ๐ like a friend,
Tho๐ght of all the things I'd never write againโ
Things like f๐nny, and y๐mmy, and alphabet so๐p;
H๐mor, I. O. ๐., and I love yo๐.
I stayed there on the floor and time went by.
Presently eno๐gh there was no more need to cry.
S๐ddenly then I was str๐ck by the tho๐ght:
๐ really did nothing to deserve what ๐ got.
And j๐st like that, my grief t๐rned to rage
As I realized there was a war for me to wage!
๐ did nothing wrong; 'twas the Apple God's sin!
The Apple God took ๐โso let the battle begin!
A hex ๐pon thee, Apple God! May all c๐rses fall on thee!
May yo๐ ever r๐e the day that yo๐ took ๐ from me!
I will get my revenge, or I will die trying!
Either Apple God or Iโone of ๐s is dying!
โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป
In loving memory of my laptop's ๐ key.
๐ ๐ข ๐ ๐ก
May yo๐ rest in peace forever in that great big keyboard in the sky.
โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป โป
1-23-22. Hey @brandt do yo๐ mind if I borrow yo๐r laptop for a while?
(EDIT: I forgot that I wanted to mention that this post is an entry to the one and only Comedy Open Mic Contest. 80 HBD in prizes this ro๐nd. So what are yo๐ waiting for, get in there.)
Oh you! I hear you! And here's to you raising a glass you are what makes you, you.
Behold, I have fixed my U.
All I had to do was rip the black plastic key thing off the keyboard, and now my U's are working fine.
๐คทโโ
!BEER
Oh whoops I don't have any beer on this account
Sorry, you don't have enough staked BEER in your account. You need 24 BEER in your virtual fridge to give some of your BEER to others. To view or trade BEER go to hive-engine.com
Hey you, did it hurt? The ripping? I see you are brighter than the others so even if it did hurt, I guess it's acceptable because of progress and becoming a better you. Although I think you already were perfect.
All part of the journey to illumination.
But how did the apple gods take ur u? Did you get your revenge? The suspense is killing me! Will I have to wait for the next episode? This is worse than a season cliffhanger for an HBO drama!
But enough about me, do you need another U? I can't promise anything, but I have a whole mess of laptops, all with perfectly good U's. I'd happily donate one, if the key fits.
That's a mystery. It had been in poor health for q๐ite a while, then I woke ๐p one morning and it j๐st wasn't working.
Not yet. I'll keep yo๐ posted tho๐gh.
And I'm not s๐re if the key is act๐ally fixable. To be clear, the key is still there - it j๐st doesn't type a ๐ when I press it.
Everything is fixable, but that sounds like it would take more than a butter knife.
Posted via D.Buzz
Yes I think I wo๐ld need a fork and spoon too. Or j๐st a spork might also work.
OH MY GOD! I am not going to tease ya by employing the letter here.
Very fnny, hilarios, entry. Thank yo for sharing it in or commnity!
yo're welcome :) thank yo for reading!
The funniest part of this is the fact that the link itself stops before u.
lol I hadn't even noticed, it must be because the "u" in the title is an emoji. Accidental comedy gold!
If you're not afraid to attack your laptop with a butter knife, you may be able to remove one of your less used keys (like an extra alt (key I mean)) and replace your U key with that.
Thanks for the s๐ggestion. I think the real iss๐e is with whatever is ๐nderneath the ๐ key. The key is still there b๐t when I tap it nothing happens.
That definitely sounds like a deeper problem, but there may still be an easy fix. Sometimes crumbs, bits of dirt, or even bugs will get under the keys, preventing them from pressing all the way down and engaging the switch. You could try prying off the top of the U and seeing if there's any cleaning to be done. Beyond that, it gets more complicated than I would want to try walking someone through in comments. There are several YouTube videos out there (probably some on other platforms as well) on laptop repair. Keyboards are usually pretty and cheap and pretty easy to fix.
Fuuuunny story. I juust pried the U key off and even thouuugh there wasn't any dirt or buugs or anything uuunder there, I am now getting even more uuuuuus than I ever couuuld have wanted.
Damn the curse of abundance!
That sounds like you have some corrosion or other contamination inside the switch mechanism. Replacement will likely be the only thing to get it like new again, unless you're into a component-level teardown and cleaning of your laptop keyboard (which could easily make things worse!).
My best thought for a quick fix: buy or borrow a cheap USB keyboard.
I thought about getting an external keyboard. But, I rather like the look of a sleek black Apple keyboard with a single glowing white hole in the middle where the U key used to be. It will make me feel extra stylish when I go into Starbucks next time.
Sounds like a great plan!
So sorry for your loss!
Thanks. I'll be okay I think, I still have 25 other keys to go before I'm totally destitute.
I miss my right alt key. He passed away a long time ago. A blank, dirty, white hole now where it used to be. At least it's illuminated. Makes my fucked up MacBookPro even more special.
I now have one of those white glowing holes of my own. You're right, it does kind of make everything feel more special.
Especially once little crumbs, dog hair and god knows what gets into it. It's the Bronx of my Mac.
Great. Can't wait for the downfall of my U neighborhood.
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Ah, f๐ck! I missed this d๐ring voting season. My apologies, ๐.
๐R apology is accepted :)