Dick-head
- stupid, annoying, horrible person; jerk: "I couldn't care less what all the dickheads up the pub reckon";
- stupid; foolish; befitting a dick-head: "It was a dickhead thing to do"; "You dick-headed nob"
The Yoga Swing
Them: Hi is this available?
Me: Yes, are you interested?
Them: [No Reply. Ever.]
Them: Hi, is this available?
Me: Yes, are you interested?
Them: Can you deliver?
Me: Where do you live?
Corio. (45 minute drive from me)
I resist the urge to tell her to use her manners, and that I am not a personal fucking delivery service, and tell her it'll be another $50 to deliver. No answer.
Them: Hi, is this available?
Me: Yes, are you interested?
Them: Does it come with ropes, carabiners and straps to attach to the ceiling?
Me: No, you'll have to get those yourself from Bunnings.
Resists urge to query why they think they'd get all the added extras for that price.
The Vintage Mirror
Them: Hi is this available?
Me: Yes, are you interested?
[No Reply. Ever.]
Them: Hi is this available? Where do you live?
Me: Names town.
Sorry too far (it's a fifteen minute drive away)
Me: Resists urge to ask them why they didn't look at the location in the advertisement and how close do they expect something to be?
Them: Hi is this available?
Me: Yes, are you interested?
Them: DIMENSIONS??????
Me: Resists urge to tell them to read the entire advertisement where the dimensions are listed, and to use their manners.
The TV Unit
Me: Hi, is this available? We can come past on Saturday, but need to know it's solid wood first?
Them: Yes, it's solid wood.
Me: Goes out of my way to get to the place to pick it up by said time, navigates traffic, a dog at the gate, two toddlers by the front door, and finds it is not solid wood and awkwardly says no thanks.
The Herbal Book
Them: Oh my god I love this book! It's beautiful! I'd like to buy it please, but I can't afford til Tuesday, is that okay?
Me: Of course, no worries. Message me Tuesday.
Them: Awesome! I really appreciate it! Thankyou!
Me: Tuesday I message her in the evening. Wait three days for her to reply that she's sorry and can't afford the $5 I'm asking. I readvertise for twice the amount and sell it the next day.
The Archery Set
Me: For sale, archery set, with arrows.
Facebook: Careful you don't get banned for advertising weopons, which goes against our policies.
Me: Shouts at screen. It's not a fucking weopon, it's a hobby.
Facebook This is a warning - you might get banned if you keep this up.
Me: Okay, I'll sell on Gum Tree.
Gumtree: Crickets.
The Peugot
Them: Hi, is this available? What's your lowest price?
*Me: Ad says $1000
Them: I'll give you $200, but my cousin will pick it up because I'm in hospital, is that okay?
Me: Blocks user, reports as spam.
The Compost Bins
Them: Three compost bins for sale, $20 each.
Me: Hi! Yes please! I'll take all three - can I pick up tomorrow?
Them:
ME: Hello?
Them: NO. REPLY. EVER.
Me: Hello????
With Love,
Are you on HIVE yet? Earn for writing! Referral link for FREE account here
That Herbal Book bit hit hard, the $5 promise then silence is peak marketplace.. As an accountant I just see it like a bad receivable, write it off fast then relist, and you did exactly that. Lowballers and ghosters are everywhere, no ADmin or policy will fix that, but your calm reply beats teh chaos and keeps your energy for the garden :)
Hi is this available?
Promptly ghosts HIVE
HELLO???? HELLLLOOOOOO????
🤣
My Dad, every time he enters house: How's the sex swing going?
The gimp costume photo just added to it. Look up @peoplesellingmirrors on Twitter . It’s great fun .
That's brilliant! 😂 I love them all. Maybe I need to up myirrpr selling game.
Been there, done that and I feel your pain although I have also bought some great stuff via marketplace. I even replaced the steel sheets on one section of my house via someone I found there.
Why are you selling the yoga swing? it's the best thing ever for lower back traction
No where to hang in new house 😭😭😭😭
Not even a tree? Ask Jamie to build you something?
It's too late! A very nice man called Josh bought it for his daughter. Another guy offered me $30 Moe which I should have accepted but Josh was a lovely guy.
Okay! A bird in the hand... Still holding thumbs for your house sale
Selling online is such a pain, too many time wasters around. But when you find someone who values and appreciates your item, it feels so good
The buyer was soooo happy with the sex swing....
🤭 I hope they have a strong sturdy ceiling in the room
Not my problem. :P
Ha! Been there, done that! 😑
I kinda feel sorry for the girl that couldn't afford the $5 book, though. 😣
You are too kind!!!!
Ah, the joy of Facebook Marketplace.
If all this aggravation came from some other modern form of classified ads, I don't want to know what it is. Knowing that Marketplace exists is all the evil I have room for in my head right now!
It is so bonkers. You definitely get the worst of people... But also the best. And I can choose who to sell to... NEVER people who are rude!