The ugly side of motherhood

in Motherhood8 months ago


Hello friends,

Been a minute here. Been off and on because I have had to face some harsh side of life but then again, i am grateful for life.

At least, just like they say, where there is life, there is hope. So I am keeping my hope alive again.

Back to my main post .....

My child is 19 months( a year and 7 months) already and whenever I look at her, I just cannot help but remember the very first day I held her in my arms. Time really runs fast indeed.

So the next school session will start next month which is September and I have been going back and forth with my decision of putting her in school.

My husband feels she is still young to be in school considering the fact that she is still mumbling words and is not fully articulated. Well, at first I agreed to his reasons. But somehow, I became withdrawn because other parents I know wants to enroll their children in the next session.

It makes me feel like I am drawing my child back and she may be a dull child at the end of the day if she doesn't start school early.

My mother is in the same school of thought with my husband. According to her, she thinks I should wait till when my baby is 2 years old. At least by then, she would have started talking so should incase something happens to her in school, she can confidently speak up. I also agree with her reasons too.

Just wondering if parents feel the same way I do. One minute you see reasons why you should hold on and the next minute, you think you may be making the wrong decision if you don't act quickly as in this case.

I want my child to be book-smart that's why I think enrolling her early is necessary but then again, she isn't up to 2 yet and hasn't even started pronouncing words properly.

Isn't it a waste of money especially when I know that attending school now looks so? I am homeschooling her already. She watches lots of cartoons and I try to make her repeat words which ends up being fruit less.

Nobody told me making decisions as a mother especially when it involves your child can be this hard. I want the very best for her. Sometimes, I feel I am just being too forward in things that concerns her. My mum will always tell me to relax and allow her be act her age.

For instance, she hates sitting on her potty and it gets me so angry especially when I see other mothers brag about how their babies no longer wear diapers. Oh my! My baby still wears diapers. It makes me feel like a bad mum that isn't doing her best to train her child as it should be.

The other day, my neighbour's child splashed water on the floor and he went to bring a rag to clean it up.

I was so impressed but was disappointed too because my baby doesn't even know how to pick up whatever she throws on the floor.

My baby is yet to say words like Dada or mama. But then she says bye and also waves her hand whenever we want to go out. She knocks on the door when she sees one and she even claps her hand too. She tries to say thank you when you give her stuff too.

I just feel bad when i see a child almost her age who does things that she doesn't do. Am I a bad mum? Or am i just over reacting? I need to snap out of this kind of feeling because it makes me worry too much.

Dear parents, how do you handle situations like this? I need a candid advice

Thank you for reading