Hi Glebert, thank you for your comment, I appreciate you taking the time to read my words and to share a few of your life experiences as well. There are some things you mention that I couldn't have phrased better.
When we surrender to the void and really go all in, there's nowhere else to go but to come out of it.
That is a great way to describe the journey I am in. Whether I share it here or not. And I'm determined to come out of it; it's really the only option for me.
As you say, journaling can be very therapeutic: writing just for the sake of lifting the weight a little. Being honest and vulnerable, first with ourselves, and then with others, can be truly scary at first but the calm that eventually comes afterward is priceless.