Long ago I realized I was on the same position you are. My wife knows nothing about crypto and if anything happens to me all the assets could be lost. I decided to write a manual with detailed instructions on what I have and how to access it. All passwords are omitted as the manual is in a shared google doc. I make reference to the private keys but do not have any of them written in the online manual.
Passwords are written in paper in a notebook. I don't even mention the name of the service/wallet corresponding to every password or private key, I just call every service an invented name (bird, sky, ocean...), that way, if someone finds or steals that notebook they don't have it easy to figure out what those private keys or passwords refer to. I may do a copy of all the info in the notebook and put them in a safe at my parents to have an extra level of security in the event my notebook gets lost or damaged.
Nice one...The good thing is you've thought about it and, better still, you've implemented a plan which I think is more than some others have done. I like your idea of key words not actual names.
Do you think your wife will be comfortable enough to access the assets if the situation requires it?
She may still not feel comfortable, but I know she will be able to get in touch with good friends who may help her do so in front of her.
That's the way...Whatever works.