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I like how u put it

we insist on beating our head over something that won't lead to anything

That's just the main problem that lead to divorce this days.

I agree with you. You need to be very calm and patient to learn how to make the right choice, before it ends up in a bigger problem, which is an unhappy life with someone.

Yes and no one will like that kind of life. Many turn to Taking away their life because of wrong choices in life. Patience is the key.