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I like my carpet crunchy but that's because I'm a believer in marking one's territory

Ah yes got to respect a man who shits on his own coffee table. Most do it to others.

That is noble of you.

that's how you stain your woods, don't ya know?

Eat some beans first. Helps it to soak into the wood.

also leaves a very pungent aroma. gets the ladies goin

At least the female dogs. Of really kinky sluts.

o draw the line at shit play lol that's for the extreme weirdos. can't knock it til ya try it though, I guess. some real innovators, those guys

As long as it is not just for (target) practice.

Plus you can always soften the carpet up by pissing on it. Saves walking all the way to the bathroom especially when gaming and drinking beer.

this is the way

Always thinking about the efficiency of a system.

at least someone respects a very efficient person