I have never thought the world owed me anything. I never really had it hard or bad but nothing ever came easy. I just had this belief I should try to be useful in what ever I was doing and no matter where I was. Getting by, trying to get ahead is always a challenge but thinking some one or a system owes you something just never felt that helpful. Just grab a job start at the bottom and try to be useful. Even after I finished my trade qualifications I was off on another tangent starting at the bottom again washing dishes at a ski hotel.
It can get overwhelming trying to learn new stuff all the time in different environments. Peak times in the kitchen were always out of control, I could never keep up with anything. Chefs needed help with the food preparations, tables needed clearing and moving, we never had enough stuff for the bus loads of people that kept showing up. After we finally got everyone sorted there was a heap of cleaning that needed doing before we could head up the mountain for some fun as well. I used to be so jealous of everyone getting up on the slopes and lifts well before me, especially on really nice weather days but there was no point whinging or complaining it was just a case of getting shit done as fast as possible so I could get into all the actions as well. That is before racing back to the hotel in the afternoons to start dinner set up and preparation.
I !LUV this frame of focusing on just being 'useful'. Sounds like you've felt that way a long time, though the first time I remember hearing this was from Arnold Schwarzenegger in his doco. I thought it was brilliant there too. !HUG
I really admire people who work hard even when they have many struggles. Starting at the bottom and working hard shows your dedication and patience. Your story is inspiring and shows how important it is to just keep doing your best. Keep going and never give up, God bless.