Hello @diebitch,
Thank you very much for that assessment of my story. I usually go back and cut words, cut sentences even, after a story is finished.
I once attended a workshop that was run by a poet. Naturally, he used language efficiently. He trained us to 'cut, cut, cut'. That I think helps to move the story along. It also can take the color out of a piece 😇.
It's very nice to hear from you!