Hello @grindan,
I answer first as myself, because as myself I can more freely express enthusiasm.
This story has an arc. A clear arc. An arc does not have to be geometric, something I can trace with my finger: beginning, middle and end. An arc goes somewhere, and not necessarily in a clearly linear sense.
The arc here: so tragic I almost can't say it. He is destroyed almost in the womb by a tyrannical, obsessive, sexually repressed mother. Whatever might have blossomed in this young man was stomped out early and repeatedly. The mother rules from the grave.
The arc begins with the abuse. It goes through childhood where he observes his father stealing moments and then giving up (on the marriage and his son) and retreating. The conflict? It runs throughout, but is contained in all those childhood, adolescent and adult moments when he tried to separate and was crushed. The resolution? A man who thirsts from his window and cannot even acknowledge his physical response to Rosie (how aptly named she is).
The story is brilliant. If you hadn't suggested plans to expand and submit, I would have made that suggestion. I think even this lovely piece could take a bit of editing here and there (just a word or two) to be perfect, but this is professional quality writing.
There, that is the end of my enthusiastic comment. Thanks for the story.
I can't even express how much this comment means to me! Thank you so much for this shining compliment, I will carry it close to my heart for quite some time 💚
There is something uniquely thrilling about hearing a soul you respect tell you how they viewed your story. That connection is the best success to me! I truly appreciate you taking the time to give me that gift 😊 to read that you feel this is professional quality made me squeal haha! Since I'm out of Luv, all the !PIZZA to you 😂😊