It Becomes A lifestyle: How The Trauma Of 20 Years Ago Affects My Lifestyle

in The Ink Well4 months ago

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I'm over 20 years now but I'm experiencing the effects of trauma I had 20 years ago.
Children can remember what happened to them when they were 6 years old.
Blessed memory to my father, may his soul rest in peace. I have a loving and caring parent who was always looking after me. My father had to come to check on me once or twice at midnight while I'm sleeping.
After the death of my father, I traveled to the city. I became a city boy! I was living with my Sibling in a rented apartment; He didn't have a house of his own even when he could build two mansions without stress.

I have friends in our estate of the same age and class; they are very friends and we love to do things together. We did our homework together. Their names were Chibuke and Frances. Though, there was a girl too but I don't like to play with girls at that age. We love football very much, we were in the same team. We all had our football kits, and some of our team members were jealous because some of them could not afford to buy a pair of boots.

One night, thieves raided our estate; they came to our building, brought all of us outside. My Sibling got a contract worth millions and he was given some money to start the contract. I don't know how hard they knew about the contract! One of the thieves said “We heard that you collected! money for a contract, where is the money?”. My Sibling love to collect cash than transfer, he was given a cash of #7 million to start the contract; a dollar was within the range of #80 - #120.
When my sibling received the money, he went to settle many things about the contract worth #5 million, he was left with #2 million. He replied, “I have used the money to settle some of the important things in the contract."
One of the thieves saw a shadow of someone watching them from the window and shot. The bullet penetrated the glass window and hit Chibuke on the forehead. We just heard a shout but we don't know what happened.
One of the thieves used the gun he carries to hit my sibling in the head and blood was gushing out. By the time the thief dragged me out, and put the gun on my head, “where is the money?"
I was half-dead, I was gone already, my heart was palpitating as if it was about to leave my body. I was sweating profusely. It seemed like I was electrocuted; I could not talk, I could not shout. Maybe it was my first time seeing a gun face-to-face, and putting a gun on my head.
My sibling replied, "the remaining one is in my wardrobe”. That was how one of the thieves went with him and collected the money.

When they left, we heard a loud cry from our neighbors. By the time I got to the place, I saw blood on the floor and Chibuke on the floor; I fell on the floor and fainted. The next day, I heard that “Chibuke is dead''.
It took me several months to recover from the shock.

4 years ago, there was a thief that stole a purse from a lady that was walking in our street, I was among the people that pursued the thief; and when he was caught, he was burn alive.
Whenever I watched robbery movies, I remembered Chibuke, my friend and what happened to me that day.
Source
How I deal with A little boy that stole #100
I was in the school last month when a student reported that they stole her money. I went to the class, made my findings and captured the boy that stole the money. He confessed to me that “Master, I'm the one that stole the money", I didn't wait to hear anything from the guy again. I beat the guy to the extent that the other teachers in the school came to his rescue. If those teachers didn't come, I wouldn't have stopped beating him because I remembered when a thief shot my friend, put a gun to my head and how they brutally injured my sibling.

After the second day, my colleague called the boy and asked him why he stole the money.
He said, Sincerely, I lent her #500 for a month now; and anytime I asked her, she replied me that she doesn't have money, and there is no a day that she won't spend #400 in the school. That was the reason I stole his money.”

After it was confirmed that the girl borrowed money from him, I was remorseful.
I have made several mistakes like that, yet, it doesn't stop me from the trauma I had 20 years ago.
It is difficult to control my emotions when I hear ‘stealing' or 'thief’.
On Friday when I was in the lounge with my friend, he was searching for his purse not knowing that he left his purse at home. I thought the pocket-picker had stolen his wallet. I said whosoever takes this purse will be burned alive today.
Whenever I hear Thief, I'm always very aggressive.
Thank you for reading my post.

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I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you to deal with the emotions that come flooding back whenever you hear the word 'thief.'

I'm glad you were able to find some closure with the boy who stole the money.

We all have our own demons to fight, and it takes a lot of courage to confront them head-on. I hope one day you will fight yours.

the good things is that I'm working it out little by little...
thank you sweetheart

Seriously? You burnt alive a person for stealing a purse? Just like that, in a street? So you participated on a murder and now brag about it? What's wrong with you!?

actually, when I heard about the thief, I started to pursue them. though not that I brag about it because I felt remorseful after everything but what happened to me makes me not to hear the word

Do you not see what's wrong? This is by far the most sick post I've ever read on Hive. If you have trauma, do something about it. Beating the shit out of school kids would not sooth old pain. Burning people on streets (do you get it? Burning people on streets!) is worse than in the Middle Ages.

However, do the hell something with yourself.

you don't understand how trauma works...
and it will never happen to you.

hmmm!! anyone caught in our street stealing will be burned except they forces come to rescue him even up till now. It is like culture in that area.
though, it may be strange to you but it happens.

Cool. That's your culture. Then you wouldn't mind I filed a criminal complaint. As I was informed, the alleged crimes are Homicide (Section 316 of the Criminal Code) and Acts of physical violence on children (as defined in Child Rights Act 2003). I did not come up with that - those are Nigerian laws, feel free to check on the documents. I believe violence against children committed as a teacher is an aggravating circumstance.

Let's see if the authorities have same opinion on what is culture in your area.

You like to play football and didn't like to play with girls at your age. That time though was fun with your school friends. As well as beating up a thief I immediately thought that killing people was wrong. But in hindsight I thought that since he had a pistol he could accidentally injure any of your friends. Later I thought beating was right. He couldn't do that inside the school. All in all you are all well and have caught the thief. Whoever suffered damage will get his money back. It is a great pleasure for him. Thank you so much for sharing such an amazing story

you read every part of my story... thank you for your feedback.

Hummn. This is really serious. The end of theft is always disastrous. I really felt for your friend. And I hope you would be able to get over the trauma with time.

It's traumatizing to experience such a horrible incident. It's painful to have lost Chibuke. Unfortunately, it took a negative toll on your reaction to any matter relating to thefts.