Incarnation of Fear

in The Ink Well3 years ago (edited)

One more turn, and then I'll be right as rain. I can feel the allure of safety in my stomach, and a gut-wrenching fear at the same time of losing it. I run like a possessed goose, panting like a mongrel, almost unaware of the strong wind coming from the opposite direction. Tall, dark, damp buildings stand strong on both sides of the road, ominous unfriendliness oozes out of them. I dared not to venture into one. Some mists are still hanging around, unsure of what to do. I can't see past twenty feet. But that ought to be enough, it has to. Pieces of loose paper are floating in the air, some are forming mini-tornadoes as the wind hits structures by the roads multiple times and can't find any route to escape. Is that going to be my fate as well?

I look back, the monster that has been chasing since time immemorial shot out of one corner, bashed into a wall. Resulting from the collision, a fountain of loose papers started flying in the air—churning rapidly in swift motions. I was captivated by the scene for a few moments. And when the monster started to gather itself again, I forced myself to forward. One step, two steps. My legs are made of stone. Buried under the earth for so many years, they started to think of them to be trees. The monster is gaining on me. I look back in abject terror and uncontrolled fascination!

It's extending its hands to catch me. I can read the papers that are hanging from its extending hand and head. A class evaluation report card from my grade school. The electricity bill of one august that I lost. Extended telephone bill because I forgot to take a copy of discontinuation of service acknowledgment. I look at its knees. Two of my missing mark sheet are there. The papers are all moist with muddy water. They laugh at my shocked face. I gulp down something that was apparently stuck in my throat. I close my eyes and break into a sprint. I finally realized what the monster is and what is its foundation.

papermonster.jpg

The monster is the incarnation of all the paperwork I feared all my life. The hatred I grew within myself for paperwork I've been forced to deal with. I've created the monster subconsciously, gave birth to it in my most vulnerable state and I've fed it with my anger and resentment. Now it has come to life to pay back tenfold—for the torment of paperwork in adult life is too great for it to be docile.

The monster started to laugh. A ball of fire flew past me. It was throwing makeshift cannonballs at me, its teeth all bared, flashing in the dim light. I could see in slow motion the fireball had papers in it. Documents required to renew a passport. Another fireball barely missed that had documents required to open a bank account. I felt a stab inwardly. It only needs to throw documents needed for a visa or government loan—I will be toast!
I could hear the monster cackle as if it's reading my thoughts. Then it started to mold the papers!


I wrote this based on the prompt "Your fear has personified itself into a monster and it's chasing you" given to me by @surrealfia.
Thank you, and I've enjoyed writing this. :)

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Hello @notacinephile,

I see that you are a member, but you are new to me. Pleasure to make your acquaintance. This was like one of those nightmares I have from time to time where I'm in school and haven't done my homework, or haven't studied for test, or....whatever the 'monster' happens to that haunts my psyche. Long past a time when any of these events present even a remote threat, they have power.

You write beautifully and effectively. Thank you for a really enjoyable read.

Hey there!

I used to write frequently many months ago in the community and got the membership status back then. But stopped writing fiction at one point and focused on topics I knew more about.

I do have that feeling as well as you described—and even when I'm awake, they gnaw at me. Sometimes years later, decades later. They linger somewhere in the subconscious, biting slowly.

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it.

This story calls to mind classic Russian stories/novels where civilians and bureaucrats are suffocated/strangled by paper. Your narrative is clever and well written. Thank you for sharing it with the Ink Well community.

Please be sure to read the work of other writers in the community and share comments with them. We are urging everyone who posts in The Ink Well to take this step, going forward, to ensure our community members are supporting one another. (We also have this in The Ink Well community rules on our home page and in our weekly writing prompts.) Thank you!

Thanks! I will check them out. It's been a while since I've interacted with the community.

I find this story very soothing, @notacinephile, despite the hint of explanation for the cause of the distress that makes up the monster's appearance.

I think the reason for my complacency is the image and symbol of the paper as the protagonist of the story.

As I read your writing, I was detached from your arguments to imagine how the papers could also form an angelic, benign and protective apparition. It would be made up of short stories, novels, poems, love letters, also the receipts with the different addresses where I have lived, birth certificates...

So many ways in which paper summarises our lives!

Your idea is magnificent, so generative! Thank you for writing.

I concur that papers may very well appear as a spirit or a guardian angel depending on their nature. All the textual works that shaped my world can surely deserve such a portrayal.
However, I wanted specifically paperwork to appear fearsome, not papers in general. Paperwork, no matter what form or content, always feels bothersome.

Thanks for the feedback and commendation. :)

Past 45, and a life long academic, I still have nightmares that I have my 2nd year bachelors degree organic chemistry exam tomorrow and I haven’t studied! I will fail. And I wake up from sleep:)

PS Organic Chemistry was my fav subject! I can’t imagine failing it 😂

Ah haha! I too have nightmares of similar nature! And for good reasons I guess. I was never a disciplined student. Perhaps in my daily life when I lapse from the expected routine, I dream of failing SSC (middle school) exam.

Love this, @notacinephile. I think I've had that same nightmare! Paperwork and the extraneous nonsense of managing our lives will haunt our dreams.

Hey, I wanted to mention that images used must be from license free or creative commons sources, unless you have paid for them, or they are your own. You can obtain images from sites like Pixabay, Pexels and Unsplash. Use of other images like the stock image you are using is a copyright violation, so our community rules make it clear that these can't be used. Unless you have purchased this image, please swap it with one from a license free site. Thank you!

Thanks! I hope we move on to doing things digitally—even though I do fear the implications it comes with.

Noted. No, I haven't bought the photo. I'm removing it.

Thank you!

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You probably wouldn't like living in Germany. I hear they have an unusual attraction for filling forms.

The story has a nice magical realism to it. Very enjoyable.

That doesn't make me happy at all! I wanted to live in Germany for a while. Dang!
Thanks! Glad you've enjoyed it. :)

Wow this is incredible

Well this took an interesting turn...

As expected from the writer extraordinaire! You painted a vivid image and then made me do a double-take when things took a turn towards paperwork...
Adult life is hard ,ay? I hope I never get the chance to turn into one...😌

Thanks for the high-praise Sam! 🤗 I hope I actually deserved that!

Well. Adult life has its perks too I know you're well aware! 😏

This monster of paperwork seems to be a common denominator. I remember library books not returned and slips reminding us of our failures landing on tables. Answer papers from exams hidden where I thought was not retrievable nooks and crannies in mom's hands. Made me laugh.. those monsters still cackle.

Oh my! It's been such a long time I read a piece as captivating as this. You held me spellbound as I read through wondering what you feared so much as beautifully described only to find out it was paperwork🤣🤣🤣. Oh dearie, you aren't alone in this. I also don't like paperwork so I totally can relate to this masterpiece. I enjoyed reading this.

Even though this is a prompt, do you think there is a way to kill this monster?

@dreemport brought me to your post!

I thought I replied here, but cannot seem to find the reply anymore!

Yes, I do detest paperwork like vermin! And all my life I've tried to avoid them but alas, they like to pursue me with persistence!