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RE: Railroad (the inkwell prompt #14)

in The Ink Welllast year

This is a mystical, moving story @mrnightmare.net. Going home is one of the most classical themes in literature, and you handle it well here. Home is not a physical place, it is a place in hearts and minds. As Jeric comes closer to his father, and his home, memories of long ago return to him. Feelings from those years return also. Jeric comes to terms with what actually happened when he was a boy, and he comes to terms with his relationship with his mother and father.

Some parts of this were a little confusing although the flow of the story did not suffer much. Readers, for example, might wonder about Fe. Is she real? Did she come on the trip? Did she buy the ticket. This is where the figure of the mother and Fe seem to blend, but this is not clear.

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Thanks for sharing your thoughts about it. As for me, it's clear that Fe wasn't really there because I thought I stated it clear that it was not Fe but it was his mother from the very beginning. From the second stanza at the last part I gave the readers to be confused how come Fe asked Jeric for approval when she didn't know the place and the relationship of Jeric from his father. Even so, it was a reader's opinion and I'm happy with that.