Trusting Blindly Was My Undoing But I Learnt My Lessons.

in HiveGhana2 years ago (edited)

Edited on Canva

Seeing the weekly engagement prompt for this week, I remembered this wonderful song Life Na Teacher by Bright Chimezie

Excerpt from the lyrics

Life na Teacher o, Life na Teacher o, Life na Teacher o, e dey teach us lesson mm
sometimes good lesson, sometimes bad lesson
sometimes life go sweet o, sometimes e no go sweet
anything wey happen to you, na very very big lesson
me i dey tell you say, this life na teacher ọ, this life na teacher o, e dey teach us lesson mmm.

See complete lyrics here.

In life, there are so many lessons to learn; the good, the bad, and the ugly including the "worstest" if such a word exist.

There's no one who hasn't learnt a lesson of whatever form in this life and I wouldn't be an exception.
Everyday I learn one or two and some have made me change my views about rendering help to people.

It is morally and ethically right to render help and assistance to our fellow humans but what will you do when those people you assisted refused to keep to their words thereby showing how untrustworthy they are. I've come to realize that some people hardly pay back the money lent to them and it's so disheartening. It discourages one from continuing to help.
On many occasions I have witnessed this and I do feel so bad because I didn't expect that they would behave such way, but like the saying goes "human beings are unpredictable"

Some years ago, I got acquainted with this guy when I traveled for a burial of one of my colleague's mother. He was supposedly that my colleague's friend so he joined us in the vehicle to the burial. We chatted all through the journey to and fro and from there I got to know that our offices were located on the same street, Infact directly opposite the other, He asked that we date but I told him that I wasn't available, but we can be good friends to which he agreed.
He showcased himself as a good and responsible guy, you know always reaching out via calls and messages comes around my office at will such that my superior even took a liking to him thinking that he was my date, lol. Well, I wouldn't blame her because the guy was dashing, no doubt.

He works at one of the radio stations in town as a freelance sports analyst, has a betting shop and a special assistant to one of the government officials, though late now but most times he complains of being broke. Ah! three sources of income are not enough to sustain you? and each time I ask he would say "you don't understand the responsibilities man has".
Okay, I don't understand but take it easy, I would say and indeed I later understood but very late.

I was home one day, precisely on a Wednesday, his call came in, I took it and in the course of our discussion he told me that he has a big problem. The boys he kept at the shop incurred some credits in his betting account and that it is on the verge of being locked if he doesn't pay before Friday. He doesn't have the money to pay up and asked that I lend him part of the money ₦30,000 which is about 112.64 Hive, he will rally round to get the other part. I asked if he had reached out to his guys. He said he did but not was willing to help but that he would still reach try some of them again
I told him to keep me posted how it goes. He ended the call.

Friday, he called again saying that no help was forthcoming and if his account was to be locked, it will remain so until he clears all credits and he doesn't know when, where and how to get the money to pay up.
He sounded pitiful, broken and pleaded that I was his last hope. Since it was weekend, and many clubs have matches to play, he was hopeful to make some money and by Monday of the next week, he will pay me back. I fell for it.

In my mind I was like, this is someone I call a friend and he needs help. Why not do so since you can. Moreover he promised to pay back in just three days. What are friends for if not to help each other.

Convinced of that I told him to come over to the house and help me to the bank so I can get the money for him. I was sick then so wasn't strong enough to move about on my own.
On our way, I asked him how much was the total amount owed, he said ₦50,000 which is 187.72 Hive and ended that he would be most grateful if I can give him all.
We got to the bank, I cashed ₦50,000 and gave him with these words

This is money I've been saving for purchase of a new phone. Since yours is urgent make sure to use it to clear the credits.

Monday came, nothing. I didn't ask him about it neither did he say anything although we spoke.
A week after I asked him, he said that even after paying the money, the company still locked his account claiming that he was still owing. So he couldn't do anything over the weekend but he will pay but I should give him sometime.
Sometime, turned to a month, months and a year Each time I raise it he keeps promising to pay. At one time he told me

Hope I know that he's not the only one owing, everyone owes, even the government owes, so I should calm down that he will pay back when he gets the money.

Oh, it was painful. I was angry at myself for not being wise enough to listen to my inner voice which asked me that day "hope you are not making a mistake?" but I waved it off.
Finally, it turned out that I made a great mistake which I still regret till date. It took me months again to save another money to buy a phone and it disorganized my plans, even my finances suffered.
There was a time my house rent was due and the money I had wasn't enough, I pleaded with him to send me the money so I can complete my rent, yet nothing. I had to source the money elsewhere.

It's been years now and he has vehemently refused to pay. He no longer works at his former places and I don't even know his whereabouts again.
Each time I remember the incident, I still feel pain, cheated that someone I called a friend not only defrauded me but could be this callous. No wonder his guys refused helping him out and I was the scapegoat, lol.

I have left him to his fate and I know that he will pay for what he did to me, someday, somehow.
I have moved on but I learnt some very big lessons.

  • Do not be so foolish to trust human beings wholeheartedly again.

  • If you must render help, especially when it comes to money, give the much that will not shake your finances or the much you can easily forgo.

  • There are friends and there are frenemies. Be wise.

I haven't stopped rendering financial assistance to people but now I do it with wisdom.

This is my entry for the #Hive-Ghana weekly engagement.

Thank you.

Still @luchyl, the #threadsaddict 🥰

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Hi @luchyl,
Thank you for participating in the #teamuk curated tag. We have upvoted your quality content.
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I'm glad to and thanks for the support too.

Truly life is a teacher, the more we live the more we keep learning, so far we live here on Earth we will continue learning everyday both the good, the bad

You are right. Living life wouldn't be meaningful if we don't learn lessons from it which will help us in this journey.
Thanks for stopping by and sharing your thoughts here.

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Thank you

All good @luchyl! You're amazing on Hive! Don't stop now, achieve that new goal!

So much to learn from this. Honestly, when people needs money they will promise you heaven and earth just to get the money from you and in the end still messed up. I remember collectively when i borrowed a friend of mine some money sometimes last year i think, it was on Friday and he promised to pay me back the following Monday which i agreed, could you believe it took me weeks before i could get my money back?. Funny enough, it wasn’t the first time he would do that to me. So since i got freed from the last one i borrowed him hmm i stopped borrowing him money even when i know i got the money. I hate promise and fail and that’s why I don’t do promises either.

I know this guy will pay for what he did to you. Because you rendered that help out of your own goodwill but he messed up big time.

Do you know how much i hate to hear that word he said to you.

it’s not only you i’m owing even government owes.

Like WTF! It’s so annoying. My prayers is more and more money will filled that void he think he caused you. It takes wisdom to borrow humans money nowadays.

I wonder why some friends do this, why must it always be money that destroys some friendship, I don't just understand.

Lucky you to recover yours unlike mine

I know this guy will pay for what he did to you. Because you rendered that help out of your own goodwill but he messed up big time.

Surely he will, that I know.
His conscience alone will continue to judge him as long as he lives.

Those words were the most hurtful ones, and that was when when I realized who he was exactly, a sheep in a wolf's clothing. But it's well.

Amen. Thank you.

This can be really really painful, he will get what he has sowed. I agree with you if given out financial assistance, just give what would not bother you much .

#dreemerforlife

It was indeed especially when it was the money I was saving for something important.

Exactly that has been my resolve. I give the much I can easily forfeit.

Thanks for stopping by

#dreemport #dreemerforlife

Humans can be disappointing sometimes.
I see your a #dreemer too. 👋🏾 hi.

Indeed, We just have to be wary of how we associate with them.

The story took me back memory lane, we should all be wary of frenemies, they are everywhere, when it comes to cash matter, do away with what you can afford to lose.

#dreemport

Exactly, I thought that I was dealing with a friend without knowing that it was the opposite. But now I'm wiser.
Thanks for stopping by.

#dreemerforlife

good term for this frenemy!
It is how we learn though @luchyl

Yeah, the experiences we have in life teach us a lot.
Thanks for stopping by

Yep and we never stop learning! My pleasure 😁

Interesting write-up, but am sorry about what happened to you, you have forgotten that humans can't be predicted.

You just have to be grateful to God that It wasn't a huge loss on your part

Thanks for sharing this with us.

#dreemerforlife

Thank you for stopping by

You are welcome.