I thought about this last night, and couldn't leave the discussion there. I do a great injustice to my mother by writing off her worldview by saying, 'She was orthodox Catholic'. Catholicism gave her the language to express a level of insight about life I have not yet achieved.
People hire life coaches. They travel around the world to sit at the feet of gurus. They take mind-altering drugs. All in the name of finding truth, an enlightened way forward.
My mother knew the way. There was never a kinder person. Never a person with less pretense. Charity? When we were living with a 'couch' that consisted of three folding chairs, she pledged $300 to the neighborhood church for a new roof. She visited sick people she didn't know. Most of all, she was forgiving.
All of that was boring for me. I had to travel my own path, and it's been bumpy, full of mistakes. But I think in my head my mother has always set the standard for good.
It's so sweet you came back to explain that it wasn't your mother, it was you. I totally understand - my parents set a moral benchmark and a way of life I too ran from. Life seemed bigger to me, perhaps as I had found examples of that in the pages of books. So I left in search of excitement tooi
I do envy people who feel that surety of faith and a strong life purpose because of it. I'll never believe in God, but those that feel guided by a higher purpose have something I'll never have.
🌷🌷♥️