Just blow it off
12 days ago in Cross Culture by selfhelp4trolls (72)
$6.99
- Past Payouts $6.99
- - Author $3.50
- - Curators & beneficiaries $3.49
- > leofinance: $0.17
104 votes
- edicted: $3.01
- sagarkothari88: $0.86
- hivepakistan: $0.58
- slobberchops: $0.56
- josediccus: $0.35
- ph1102: $0.16
- hive-ja: $0.14
- djynn: $0.13
- kenechukwu97: $0.12
- dbooster: $0.11
- maxwellmarcusart: $0.10
- kendewitt: $0.08
- cwow2: $0.08
- tripode: $0.08
- amberkashif: $0.04
- go-kyo: $0.04
- foodchunk: $0.04
- smartvote: $0.03
- builderofcastles: $0.03
- kemmyb: $0.03
- and 84 more
The way I have started looking at things like this is… If they have a problem with me for whatever reason, that is their problem, not mine.
It’s hard to keep that mindset sometimes because as humans we are emotional creatures but you have to just go with the flow.
Hell, I feel the same way at times with people in my own life with family and friends. Lately I have been feeling it very much here on Hive. After trying to build communities, offer business opportunities, educate, etc, I feel like I am ignored on the chain these days because I am not apart of a certain cliche. Found myself getting very upset about how I have poured 5 years into this chain for basically nothing. But I have had to just take it at face value that most people only care about themselves, especially online, and move on. I am powering down my stake and moving what little funds I have into my trading account or putting it into my homestead farm and just looking at it as just another social media network.
You don’t have control over other people’s actions or reactions, only your own. So I have stopped worrying with it and just moving on to greener pastures… Literally, like I need to go cut 2 acres of grass today, 😂
I think people like us are in a tricky situation. We want to be completely self sufficient (that’s you too right?) and that requires a support base, so we are constantly trying to spread outwards to build that support base, which is an upward battle.
I have to constantly remind myself to value my individual relationships and to focus on building better ones because I get so lost in the grind to self sufficiency. Ironically I think NOT trying to promote my work and just getting involved in stuff with other people has been the best promotion for my work. Like just meeting the right people and telling then what i do and get to know them is far more effective than twitter ads but I always feel so tired of it because there are disappointments and awkward interactions and disagreements and all that. Online there is a block button. Or i can ignore a certain app.
But I guess I don’t wanna say “it’s their problem, because there are things I can learn from taking others issues with me seriously. Not going to go against my core values though, and being chill is one of them.
I hear you. I do value the few individual relationships I have for sure. Those are the ones that I care about their opinions. The rest, well, again, if they don’t like me, that’s their problem because I am an awesome dude, lol. But with society the way it’s going, I am getting more cynical and closed off by the day, but that’s because much of my socializing is online and most social media is an over saturated dumpster fire.
I am starting some new things up that I will be getting out in front of people more, which is where I can shine a bit more than getting lost in the internet wasteland.
I think the fact that Japanese people do not speak their emotions directly also happens in every part of the world.
Here in Nigeria too, you gotta think about what someone has said for about five times before you understand what the person had said
I wonder why most people like to beat around the bush. I also feel the reason why you are tired to go out is because you have done that too much lately and you gotta take some rest from it
I noticed that some African friends are very polite and I’m not sure if they are speaking straight with me. It’s not dishonesty, it’s more about keeping harmony and trying to keep things smooth, similar to Asia.
Actually people do it in America too but they don’t really overthink things. If anything they don’t think enough 😆
This is an interesting take and it says a lot about humanity and how we react to things that happen while we socialize with people. It's already obvious that we react differently to certain situations and in most cases, we try to be on very good term with people.
However, there comes a moment when we also have to look out for ourselves and our mental health. It wouldn't make sense to ignore everything good for me or hold back from expressing myself just because someone else may not be on the same page.
From what I know about life, being able to do what's geared toward staying mentally stable would always count as a good idea.
It can be a really difficult balance. Trying to avoid conflict will inevitable cause some overthinking, and avoiding conflict is good. But too much overthinking is really painful too. So I guess the line I draw is to not circle around the same ideas too many times or to make myself uncofmrotable by overthinking
Yeah, nothing does deserve to dominate the mind if it isn't resourceful. We care, and I do understand you. Caring I a big part of us as humans. We are mammals, thus, the need to care.
We notice, we think, and we act. It is crazy but the moment we make peace with some things or some people and get to realize the need for our peace over them, it gets better.
aye, the hope is that by staying as true to our inner compass as possible we help life sort things out for us.
it's such a bad lingering feeling if a "friendship" is ultimately based on a social pleasantry rather than actual resonance and a natural shared interest. better to be hardcore true from the beginning and see who remains.
god, we all carry so many programs both noticed and unnoticed. can't even begin to imagine what japan is like though i feel through your perspective i can at least catch a glimpse sometimes
lol I always end up defending Asia because honestly I have a muuuuch harder time in the west. People have less physical space in Asia so they tend to give more social space if you aren’t best of friends. That really saves me because I need social space. They also tend to listen better. But the trade off is that people really don’t make an effort to be friends and get closer, they wait for you to do it.
I really don’t like to make enemies so I do everything I can to avoid it. Everything but be disingenuous or manipulative or stress about every little thing.
sounds super balanced once again
I think that is the problem of the whole Asian culture. Same is the case in my country, Pakistan. People don't show their exact emotions. They don't give their opinions directly rather indirectly in vague manner that creates even more confusion.
I have learnt a formula for a peaceful mind. Don't do anything with an intention to hurt anyone. If a person is still hurt, that's not in my control.
(Lolz. I still get influenced by people reactions though but not as much as it would be otherwise)
How have you been @selfhelp4trolls? Long time.....
I love the way people are sensitive enough to try and pick up on hints here. What I don’t like is how things that people take it all so seriously all of the time and constantly stress about how others interpret them.
Your rule is a good one. I always think about it like doing laps in a race. Every time you ponder something deeply is one lap around that issue. I can think one lap. Maybe two. But I’m not going to go around and around a thought and act like that’s gonna lead me somewhere.
Im good! I went to check your profile recently and didnt see any new posts. I forgot when that was. Glad you are still around.
Perhaps that's the subliminal learning from the culture. A habit to always go for some hidden meaning. For instance, once I silently smiled when my mother in law was speaking about something. After the gathering was over the wife of my husband's brother asked me in secrecy why I was smiling. My goodness.....! She thought it was a sarcastic smile over something she couldn't figure out.
Well, I was smiling just as a habit. I often smile to for no purpose. Just for the exercise of my facial muscles.
I agree. Going around and around on a thought leads nowhere but hives us dizziness.
Thanks for the visit @selfhelp4trolls. I haven’t published anything for several weeks. Trying to come back to the writing but the responsibilities in the offline world are not giving me enough time.
Have a nice day
👏 Keep Up the good work on Hive ♦️ 👏
❤️ @bhattg suggested sagarkothari88 to upvote your post ❤️
🙏 Don't forget to Support Back 🙏