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RE: Letting my partner be responsible for herself

in Cross Culture2 years ago

Well, I'd say time for paying attention to each other is essential anyway. And let's face it, opening our eyes can be super scary, so patience is always needed for everyone involved, along with constantly making sure there is a safety net, while keeping in mind that it's all a simulation anyway. But in my opinion, it is perhaps THE closest a person can be to another another one, by giving them the feeling of safety to act and play and let out whatever.

I can see how this could be shocking at first, for someone who has never done this, but trusting in the guidance of the other one, they can discover amazing things... or simply have incredible laughs. In my case, I would say when I act out things with my partner, and we end up both rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably... I think it's even more intimate than sex, honestly.

Of course small, easily digestible pieces of situations should build up the trust, and help drop inhibitions. Doing this frequently should get you both comfortable with it, allowing creativity to bubble up. And if you take purely simple banalities at first, just so that you get used to playing, the emotionally laden topics may not be so shocking any more later on.

Wait... Is it even clear what I'm talking about? Take for example the ice-cream vendor situation: One of you sells ice-cream, there are all the flavors except for pistachio, which is exactly what the other one wants to buy. What are all the different ways you could react? You act one out briefly, then you switch. After the third or fourth round I will guarantee that someone will end up sharing some previously hidden side of their personality, most likely something so minor and insignificant that it seems not even worth the mention. Still, it is an important piece of the safety net which will allow you to do this with heavier, more traumatizing topics.

Okay... it was not my intention to write such a long reply, especially not about giving abrupt advice on acting sessions! However, I don't want to discard what I've written either, hoping that you won't mind.

Thanks for the !PIZZA by the way! 😉

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Ah! maybe I was imagining something a little more extreme...like "Imagine I got someone pregnant" or "What if I left you for him" or "What if I was actually gay and hiding it the whole time" or "What if we got kicked out of the country". Hahaha we need to tone it down a bit!

!pizza

Wow, these topics sound like upper-inter at best, but more from the proficient category. I guess they can be interesting, but only after you've had plenty of practice with more benign issues.