Jueves de TBT: Tú si me querías | TBT Thursday: You Did Love Me [ESP - ENG]

in Top Family4 months ago (edited)

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ESPAÑOL

Hola a todos por acá en esta interactiva comunidad de Top Family. En esta ocasión @lanzjoseg nos invitó a participar de este concurso que empezó como una iniciativa personal. En este jueves me quiero unir y publicar mi TBT porque podría desahogar un poquito lo que siente mi corazón.

De verdad agradezco haber encontrado esta comunidad en Hive, pues me parece alentadora y motivadora. Cada día hay una nueva actividad que nos hace pensar más allá de lo que vemos y que creemos, podemos escribir.

ENGLISH

Hello everyone here in this interactive Top Family community. This time @lanzjoseg invited us to participate in this contest that started as a personal initiative. This Thursday I want to join and publish my TBT because I could unburden a little bit of what my heart feels.

I am grateful to have found this community in Hive because I find it encouraging and motivating. Every day there is a new activity that makes us think beyond what we see and what we think, we can write.

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Una pequeña feliz con un padre que la ama

Les puedo decir que no recuerdo muy bien lo que pasó el día de esta foto. Sé que me encontraba con mis padres, visitando familiares en Anaco. Mi mamá nació en Anzoátegui y cuando estaba pequeña solíamos ir una vez cada cierto tiempo. En esta foto estamos mi papá y yo cuando estaba pequeña.

Siempre fue mi foto favorita, mi papá solía cargarme todo el tiempo. Yo vivía pegada a él cual garrapata. Me decían que era su zarcillo, incluso en mi adolescencia, en mi juventud siempre estaba con él.

Cuando nací mi mamá decidió mi primer nombre Ariana, por la protagonista de una novela. Mi abuela quería que mi segundo nombre fuera Josefina, pero mi papá se opuso y dijo que me llamaría Alegría, porque fui su mayor alegría en la vida. Desde ahí, mi papá estuvo conmigo en todo momento.

Me tenían que poner interiores de él en la cuna para que pudiera dormir, me iba con él a sus empleos, cuando iba a comprar, a divertirse, veía béisbol por él. Siempre fuimos muy unidos. Mi papá era mi mejor amigo.

A medida que crecí, siempre conté con mi papá. Siempre sentí el amor de mi papá.

A happy little girl with a father who loves her

I can tell you that I don't remember very well what happened the day of this photo. I know that I was with my parents, visiting relatives in Anaco. My mom was born in Anzoátegui and when I was little, we used to go once in a while. In this picture is my dad and me when I was little.

It was always my favorite picture, my dad used to carry me all the time. I lived attached to him like a tick. They used to tell me that I was his tendril, even in my adolescence, in my youth I was always with him.

When I was born my mother decided to give me my first name Ariana, after the protagonist of a novel. My grandmother wanted my middle name to be Josefina, but my dad objected and said he would call me Alegría because I was his greatest joy in life. From then on, my dad was with me every step of the way.

They had to put me inside his crib so I could sleep, I would go with him to his jobs, and when he went shopping, to have fun, I would watch baseball for him. We were always very close. My dad was my best friend.

As I grew up, I always counted on my dad. I always felt my dad's love.

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Una imagen recreada con mi hija años después

Una enfermedad lo cambió todo

Recientemente a mi papá le dio un sexto ACV sumado a una crisis diabética. Después que salió del hospital empecé a notar cambios en su actitud hacia mí. Cada día que ha venido pasando después de ese 25 de noviembre ha sido un golpe a mi corazón.

Ahora solo puedo recordar el amor de mi papá, como lo sentía antes, como siempre fue. Este ACV tocó una parte de su cerebro que controla sus emociones o algo así. Soy hija única, por tanto, tengo que corregir a mi papá cuando lo veo haciendo algo que no debe, debo regañarlo y ponerle límites por su bienestar, por mantenerlo sano.

Esto, a él no le ha gustado para nada y lamentablemente creo que se la ha ido desapareciendo el amor de padre que un día tuvo por mí. Ya no soy su alegría. Ahora me ve más como una molestia. Sé que mi papá, el que me ama, me consintió, el que me cargaba como en esa foto de hace 35 años, el que me aconsejó, me formó está ahí, escondido.

Sé que mi papá está detrás de esa máscara de una enfermedad que le viene repitiendo desde sus 40 años. Sé que mi papá me ama aún, pero duele cada palabra y cada acción. Por eso, quería hoy volver atrás y sentirme segura porque papá está ahí y no dejará que nadie me haga daño jamás.

Gracias por haberme leído y llegar hasta aquí. Si estás pasando por una situación difícil, recuerda que no estás solo, que siempre hay personas que estamos dispuestas a escuchar.

Les dejo mis redes sociales por si quieren seguirme y un abrazo lleno de todo el cariño del mundo.

Twitter: @ariale
Instagram: @arialeval
Tik Tok: @arialerai

An illness changed everything

Recently my dad had a sixth stroke and a diabetic crisis. After he got out of the hospital, I began to notice changes in his attitude toward me. Every day that has passed since November 25 has been a blow to my heart.

Now I can only remember my dad's love, the way he felt before, the way he always was. This stroke touched a part of his brain that controls his emotions or something like that. I am an only child, therefore, I have to correct my dad when I see him doing something he shouldn't, I have to scold him and set limits for his well-being, to keep him healthy.

He has not liked this at all and unfortunately, I think that the fatherly love he once had for me has been disappearing. I am no longer his joy. He now sees me more as a nuisance. I know that my dad, the one who loves me, spoiled me, the one who carried me like in that photo from 35 years ago, the one who advised me, trained me is there, hidden.

I know that my dad is behind that mask of an illness that has been repeating itself since he was 40 years old. I know my dad still loves me, but every word and every action hurts. That's why I wanted to go back today and feel safe because my dad is there and he won't let anyone hurt me ever again.

Thank you for reading me and making it this far. If you are going through a difficult situation, remember that you are not alone and that there are always people who are willing to listen.

Text originally written in Spanish and translated by DeepL Translate. I'm sorry if there are any mistakes.

I leave you my social networks in case you want to follow me and a hug full of all the love in the world.

Twitter: @ariale
Instagram: @arialeval
Tik Tok: @arialerai

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Siento lo de la enfermedad de tu papá, pero que bueno que lo comprendes y te quedes con esos recuerdos felices del hombre que siempre te amó.

Muchísimas gracias. No le niego que hay días que es muy difícil, pero bueno sólo queda seguir.

You are very close to him, you also made a lot og memories with him, so I understand that everythint is changing now. But Im sure too that he loves you. Understanding and love is what he need right now. Maybe he is just stress because of what happened to him. Either way, stay brave and strong together. How's you dad bow by the way?

Well, here we go. The neurologist told us that a part of his brain was affected, and he sent him for further tests.
For now, that affected part is the one that makes him not want me anywhere near him.
But well, here we go one day at a time, remembering and clinging to those days when he was fine.

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Thank you so much!!

Go for it @ariale! You've got what it takes to reach your new target on Hive.