in the age of perfect AI music, mistakes and imperfections are going to be the gems of experiencing music/art.
I'm not a musician, but I read a cool book once called "Zen Guitar". It talks about the journey of improving your skills and going from a white belt to black... but then also trying to get from black back to white... where mistakes are liberating and where effortlessness takes a lot of practice... your post seems to resonate that idea.
I hope you had an awesome performance, just as you were hoping to deliver.