Kiss #110: Gifting With Motives And Boundaries

in The MINIMALIST24 days ago (edited)

Caring and sharing is what many good heart ♥️ people do because of what they believe in “ that when you give more you will receive more. And I don’t see this kind of gifting as anything because its a gift 🎁 desired from the heart to touch other peoples life. To these set of people doing fervor is part of what makes them happy 😊.

But for many other people, giving of gifts 🎁 is attached with a motive which sometimes is not made openly but through giving of gifts and attitudes, one notices some languages while others may not see it. When all these is going on , some will patiently be waiting for the right time to make some moves if you pretend not to notice.

Am the kind that like being around people and I love giving gifts especially those that I have known for a while and as an extrovert I connect to people easily which makes me feel at ease with life. Doing all these is to make life worthy of living. But one thing I don’t cherish in people is taking others for what they are not or feeling what the other is not feeling. It does not seat right with me because I respect people I love ❤️ and don’t want to hurt them.

Years back during my 8:00 to 5:00, I have some colleagues whom along the line of work we became close friends, interacting at leisure time, go for lunch together and even hang out some weekends together because our schedules are always discussed openly at the office. And since we are close I will buy little gifts 🎁 for one or two persons during Christmas 🎅, birthday gift and other casual gifts.

And as time passes, one of the guys Evans started to reciprocate giving me some gifts as well which I usually accept without any ounces attached. And it happened that during the valentines period of this said year I got a gift I never expected from Evans. It was an expensive necklace. Waoh! I shouted . This is too expensive Evans I said to him. He replied me saying “you deserve it girl for all you are doing for us here in the office” And what can I say, but deep down inside my heart ♥️ I know something is happening. I can see how this love languages usually begin without you knowing if you don’t pay attention. I decided from then on to be at alert.

And from then on, I could see how jealous he usually feel when am talking with other male colleagues of ours, wanting more attention from me and even restricting himself from our group outings. This is not normal I told myself. I did not bargain for this kind of trouble around the office and must look for a way to put it to a stop. But I needed to talk to a girl friend of mine on this issue because I don’t want to hurt someone.

Few months later after speaking to my best friend of what is happening around the office which she simply told me that Evans is in love 🥰, I asked Evans out over the weekend to strengthen out the issue. I know I will be hurting someone but I needed to set this boundary before its too late. There and then after some minutes of general discussion , I told Evans of how he must stop the extra miles he is going if he wants us to maintain our relationship at casual levels. I told him how he will hurt himself if he continue with those feelings I don’t feel because am not ready for such. He felt so bad the way I turned him down but got over it after weeks. And it was fine afterwards. We are still the best of family friends until now.

Its a thing of the heart ♥️. Love is a very strong feeling that many will use gift 🎁 giving as their approach. And many others can be outright taking the bull by the horn. Its left for us to take things like this serious and set the boundaries before its late thereby hurting someone’s feelings so badly.!

Thanks for reading friends. Have a nice weekend. Love ❤️.

Images are mine.

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Hi my friend! 🤗 It must have been a bit of an uncomfortable situation for you. But I think you were right to talk to him, as you had no feelings of love for him. It's better that than disheartening 💟

Aww beautiful 😻. It was indeed an uncomfortable situation. I really did not want to hurt him by pretending, do I took the bold step.

Thank you lovely 🥰 for you wonderful supportive words. I appreciate your time stopping by. Enjoy your weekend ❤️