Whenever I visit California I am invariably asked this question:
"When are you moving back home?"
Over the past nine years of living outside my home country (the United States) I have tried out many different responses to this question. At first I said "oh I don't know ... someday?" Then I tried out (in my more rebellious stage) responding with "never!"
Both responses led to uncomfy follow up questions and a general sour mood.
Instead of creating such downer attitudes with my responses I am trying something new.
Instead I say "I am home"
Younger me avoided questioning on my future living location. Now, I reject this paradigm of having to choose a single home. I do live most of the year in Argentina but, I also visit California once, twice, sometimes even three times a year for weeks each visit.
And while at home, I definitely feel at home.
I sleep in my childhood bedroom, read my favorite YA books, and engage in just as many crafts as I normally do. Also, when visiting home I live with my parents and spend a lot of time with my sister and the extended family. Most years I actually spend more time with my folks than my sister does. And she lives just on the other side of the state and visits much more often (but not as long) as I do.
Besides being born there, and visiting often, there is something else that establishes my connection with California. I have, quite literally, put down roots there. Each time I visit my parent's place I spend quite a bit of time in the garden. Transplanting plants, sowing seeds, planting new baby greens, and just ... connecting with Earth.
Culturally I never felt like I truly fit in in California. I resent the shopping centers that have covered this beautiful landscape. I cry at the thought of native oak forests being destroyed to make way for yet another resort. I hate the hustle & bustle, and after a few weeks of constant leaf blowers sounding off I always feel ready to return to my secluded spot in Argentina.
But, whenever I am home (and wherever home is) I truly feel ... at home.
So, really, why do I have to choose just one place to call home?
I don't have to and so I won't.
I claim two.
Hi there! my name is Chloe Calendula and I have been writing blog posts exclusively for Hive for two years. I share about herbalism, gardening, homesteading, crafts & more. All the pictures I share are my own and never include any sort of AI images or words. I would so appreciate if you followed my blog and I will happily follow you back.
It sounds like the best answer might be "I have two homes. That way I can always be where it's summer !" 😁
yes totally! and that is exactly what I did this year :)
And people tend to like that answer so much better than my sassy responses when I was younger.
Thanks for your comment!
very beautifully said - "home is where I am now". It's both a good way to de-escalate the argument, and also just a good overall mentality to apply.
Indeed Cali is a beautiful state! I visited it a couple of times and I'm always fascinated by the variety of plant species and ecosystems (even dead in the center of a city). And Argentina was a delight to visit. I was there only a few days, in Buenos Aires, but I really enjoyed seeing how Argentinians love their dogs and the culture of wearing slippers everywhere, it just vibed differently.
De-escalate the convo is a perfect way to phrase it!! I used to respond ina reactionary way and with time am learning to answer questions in a calming way.
And yes California is so beautiful!! I always love to connect with the forests, beaches & parks. I feel so lucky to get to call two places home. Thank you for the kind support!!
Entonces hablas español :D que alegría!
Yo siempre he pensado que donde este mi familia esta mi hogar. O incluso, puedo convertir en un hogar el lugar que desee.
si! hablo español! Que lindo que sientes en casa donde este su familia <3