So ayun na nga, may pa-prompt si @tpkidkai ngayong buwan ng June. Syempre tangkilikin natin ang mga pakulo ng kaibigan natin. Mainam din kasi para di ako maubusan ng topic dahil may mga blogging goals tayo ngayong taon na ito. Kailangang panindigan.
English
Anyways, the topic for today is about divorce. Are you pro or anti divorce? My circle of friends are mixed in this regard. I have friends who are strongly opposed to this, I have friends who are also expressing their inclination towards the idea. As for me, there is no other tasteful way to say this but I can say that I am not against divorce. Don't get me wrong, I am happily married to my husband (so far), but I am not opposed to the idea of divorce. I mean I would surely hope we don't ever get to that point in our marriage, but I hope that if we ever arrive at a situation where the need for it arises, I would be happy if we have that option.
I arrive at this opinion in a very factual way. Even though I am one of those children whose parents were able to fulfill the till death do us part portion of their wedding vows, I still witnessed several cases of complicated families where the parents are either just keeping it together for the sake of the kids, the wife endures the suffering caused by his drunk, anger-issue-driven husband, or the wife keeping her mouth shut and continuously accepting her cheating husband. These are real life stories, not mine to tell, but kept me thinking that these women had to stay married to that wrong person, all because they don't have an option.
Another reason why I am not against divorce is the way things are settled legally. We all know that once a couple is married, if they did not put up a pre-nuptial agreement, their properties will be conjugal. Wherever they go, if they have insurance, their beneficiaries will automatically be their spouse whether they are together or not. In a divorce, the couple will be able to settle these things legally and peacefully. Along the process, they'll also be able to settle the custody of the children. I personally know people who lived their youth in the most uncomplicated way. I know, even without divorce, the couple could still talk about it and agree amicably, but it is always safe if it is done legally.
If you are a hopeless romantic, you may also look at it this way. I have promised my husband that I will always choose him no matter what. Without the option of divorce, that promise somehow is just a given. It's like Yeah, you don't really have a choice. You are legally bonded to each other. This promise is much more sweeter and would mean so much if the married couple stay married until death parts them.
To sum it up, I don't hope that I would not need to divorce. I am not looking forward to that. But it sure would be nice have that option and not need it, than to need it and not have it.
Tagalog
Ang topic ngayon ay tungkol sa divorce. Ikaw ba ay pro or anti divorce. Hati ang circle of friends ko tungkol dito. May friends akong matindi ang pagkaayaw sa divorce, meron din akong friends na agree dito. Para sa akin, walang ibang magandang way para masabi ito, pero masasabi kong hindi ako opposed sa idea ng divorce. Sana ay hindi ko kailanganin ito pero syempre, if ever na umabot ako sa ganung punto ng buhay ko, mas okay na may ganung option ako.
May mga pinagbasehan din naman ako sa opinion ko na ito. Lumaki akong buo at masaya ang nanay at tatay ko, naghiwalay lang sila nang yumao ang aking ama, pero may mga kakilala akong buo lang ang pamilya nila kasi nag stay together ang parents para lang sa mga bata. May mga kakilala rin akong binubugbog ng asawa pero nananahimik lang ang babae. Meron din namang tinatyaga lang ang babaero at iresponsable nilang asawa dahil nga kasal sila. Wala silang ibang choice kasi hindi na sila makakapag asawa ulit nang legal.
Diba't mas sweet ang pangakong pipiliin mo ang iyong asawa kung alam mong may iba naman syang pwedeng pagpilian pero sya pa rin ang pinili mo? Pwede ring tingnan ang ganyang anggulo kung gusto mo ng mas romantikong POV.
Maganda rin ang divorce kasi isa itong way para legal na mapag usapan ang mga kailangang pag usapan tulad ng mga ari-arian, insurance claims, etc. Dito rin sa prosesong ito, mase-settle na rin kung saan at kanino mapupunta ang pangangalaga sa mga anak na menor de edad. Alam kong pwede naman itong pag usapan kahit walang divorce pero mas mainam kung daanin talaga sa legal na proseso.
To sum it up, ayokong dumating ako sa punto na kakailanganin ko ng divorce. Pero mas mainam na kung sakali man na kailanganin ko, alam kong may option ako.
Nakakatawa kasi kamakailan lang, nag-ninang ako sa kasal. Mga ilang araw ang lumipas, tinawagan din ako ng isa ko pang kaibigan. Kinukuha nya naman ako para magsulat ng salaysay tungkol sa kanilang mag-asawa. Kailangan daw niya ito para sa proseso ng pagpapawalang bisa naman ng kasal nila. O, diba? Ang saya? Sa isang banda ay imahe ng masayang pagsasama, sa kabila naman ay isang halimbawa ng pagmamahalan na nauwi sa hiwalayan. Kaya oo, I see how it feels to be happily married but I also see how it is to be legally tied to someone and suffer and not have any option to be freed.
I agree with you, mommy! Having a divorce doesn't mean that those who are happily married are required to have divorce. Dunno why people think it's the ultimate endpoint to those who are married. I would say it should be one of the options and even the last resort to those marriages that can no longer be mended. At least there's an option to get away from abusive partners. Denying this right to people who needed it just because your marriage is okay is just selfish. And I'm talking about you, Cynthia Villar. 😆
We still have a long way as a country, but at least there's discussion on matters like this. SOGIE Bill next.
Hahaha nako si Cynthia talaga!
truee, need pa i-educate ang maraming Pilipino about divorce. Akala yata nila ifforce silang makipag divorce kahit happily married sila kaya against sila.
Grabe no! Need talaga malalang education campaign. Kaso mga Pinoy mga tigasin ang ulo kahit di naman sound mga pinaniniwalaan nila. Kaya para sa akin, wala na talagang pag-asa ang bayang ito. HAHAHA
hahaha. nakakaloka to si Cynthia talaga.
People are either just scared of change. And this is such a big change to their beliefs. Or baka gusto lang nila yung title na the last of the countries na walang divorce. haha. Malay natin, kapag naka move forward ang mga nasa maling relasyon, mag move forward na rin ang ekonomiya natin. Yung mga politikong umaayaw sa bill na ito, baka bet lang talaga nila na aping api ang mga tao para naman magmukha silang hero kapag tinutulungan nila yung mga tao. haha
Mga pulitikong dagdag gastusin sa kaban ng bayan na wala namang tangible na nagagawa. Puro mga PR lang inaatupag.
Solomot for joining the contest hahah
So ayun na nga di naman tayo kasi ang customer ng divorce law na yan pero kahit na bakit naman natin ipagkakait sa iba.
When April and I had a talk to such, true na may VAWC and pwede mong ipakulong ang asawa mo for such cases, pero still kasal parin sila kahit na naka kulong they are still legally binded to everything kaya hirap makapag move forward.
Napakamahal ng proseso ng annulment at still parang iba pa rin yun sa divorce. Di lang magets ng marami na ang divorce ay last resort na lang talaga kapag talagang may pisikalan nang nagaganap na hindi na talaga madadaan sa mahinahong usapan.
Uy, wag mo na ako isali sa papremyo. haha. This is my official saling ketket na entry lang. haha
I strongly oppose the idea of divorce but there are times when it is needed. If you get to realize that your marriage isn’t working anymore and the best thing you can do for yourself and your mental health is divorce, why not?
I can’t say that divorce is totally bad and we never can tell what we will do until we are in the shoes of those people but I hope we never get to experience it
It is best to always do everything in our power to avoid having the need of divorce. But this is a real solution for real problematic marriages. yeah, we hope we don't have to need it but all the same, it is good to have that option should the need arise.
Kailangan lang ng bawat pamilya ang manalangin.
Tama ka dyan, kapag kasi usapang berbal lang at walang batas na namagitan ay malamang mauwi lang sa away.