I dont know when I'm going to catch a break 2 years of this business and i lost everything twice.
I'm stressed out so much I can't even sleep anymore. I might die of a heart attack one day I'm sure of it this time the amount of stress I've been through all these years and constant failures good lord this is a joke 😂🤣
It's hard to believe i planned everything so well everyone couldn't believe how i built this alone only a madman does it and i did it but in the end lost everything it doesn't make any sense at all.
They said I'm smart i planned well I made it happened i built things with my own hands i built a chicken farm large enough with my own hands to fit 5000 chickens day and night just hammering 🔨 the woods 🪵 and nails i get sick so many times due to the extreme heat then at night extreme cold.
I even burned 🔥 myself few times I have scars all over now well my modeling career is over 🤣🤣 . I also cut myself so many times these past 2 years I can't even count now even cut myself with a grinder bloody hell that was scary blood everywhere had to walk over to the next house while I raise my hands up so the blood dont gust out so much. By the time I arrive at the door I passed out 😂😂 luckily I woke up after few seconds they gave me bandages and all and asked if they should send me to the hospital I said its fine I bandage myself up and i told them let me rest for awhile I'm just in shock dont worry so much.
Well I cut myself many times at the restaurant so this is no difference. I read so much about chickens people start to call me chicken man.
I should have just stayed in Abu Dhabi and went to Australia or The US from there like I planned. Or I should just live like a normal person find a job just be a slave forever while keeping my savings from Abu Dhabi safe in the bank while I get small amount of interest its not much but at least when I grow old no one take care of me so that money can last for awhile.
Sigh I dont know man wtf did I do so wrong. Everyone I know says I'm a genius yea right a poor genius there's no such thing as a poor genius I'm doing something wrong I just know it but I just dont know what yet.
I tried to stay cool but damn man 2 years i wasted next year will be the third year holy fuck me. Another year of failure? Well with how things are why not right 😂. Damn I let everyone down this time. It's 4am and i can't sleep i can't relax no matter what I do. I really dont want to write this but I dont know what else to do. It's true the movie you watch when they show only gangsters and powerful people can do big business small guys wont stand a chance without a group.
In my mind I wish I never met anyone my life would have been so much better if I just stayed in my own lane.
(Picture made with Google AI)
I understand you perfectly; you poured all your energy, time, effort, and money into something you hoped would work, but it didn't. Naturally, you feel anger, frustration, sadness, and disappointment. And I’d love to tell you that things will get better, that there is light at the end of the tunnel, but I can't say that because I haven't achieve it myself; I’m in the same boat, fighting for something I believe in. All I can suggest is that you ask yourself what would you regret more in five or ten years: continuing to try, or stopping to look for another job? Perhaps that will help you decide on your next step. I sincerely hope that, whatever you choose, things go incredibly well for you and you succeed
Thank you my friend. Yea I guess what my real friends just like yourself tells me the same thing maybe im not cut out for this.
I guess im not a boss or i can't be one. I can make people rich but I can't build something for myself and make myself rich.
We men need to be honest with ourselves in the end. Anyway sorry you have to go through something similar or maybe worse than im doing right now.
But that's life I guess we have to move on no choice. Thank you again for your comment appreciate it
Hmmmm, are you saying this because you have evidence that you aren't a good boss, or just because you failed again? There’s a huge difference between a conclusion based on facts and one based on emotions.
From what I read, you did everything yourself and never mentioned hiring anyone, so I don't see why you say you can't be a boss. Or maybe what you mean is that you aren't cut out to run your own business.
But...well, I’m probably not the best person to say this, since I’m too stubborn to ever give up, and what you say is true: we have to be honest with ourselves. But, if you feel this is your path, if you truly want to make this chicken business succeed and you still have the financial means and the opportunity to try again, then I say you should try it once more. I don't know why you failed this time, but surely you know where things went wrong, and you can learn from that and try to improve. I know it sounds like a cliché, but every failure teaches us something new; it’s just a matter of figuring out how to do better.
Of course, if you feel this is the end of the road for that business and you want to do something else, that’s fine too. Just try to set your emotions aside for a moment and analyze the situation with a cool head. Maybe you could get a job, save up, and try again in a couple of years, or perhaps start a different business. Only you can know what’s best for you right now. Sending you a big hug and good vibes ❤️
Well if you put it like that the company I made contract with did say out of all the other farmers mine was getting improvement with each cycle and much cleaner and almost zero flies and birds coming to the farm due to how crazy I am with cleanliness.
The reason why it failed is due to the haze from Indonesia it cause temperature become so hot, so hazy and brought some type of disease. Just because of the disease that comes with the haze I lost 90% of the chickens.
I lost all my savings, profits and now I even owe the contract company so much just because of this one incident that's why I dont know why I work so hard for 2 years and lose everything and become in debt just because of something I can't control.
See, that is completely different from saying you aren't cut out to run your own business. You said it yourself: this was a weather-related issue beyond your control, unless you had something like a factory with air conditioning and a strictly controlled environment to prevent it.
The important thing now is to negotiate the debt with the company so it doesn't become an overwhelming burden, giving you some breathing room to figure out how to pay it off. Perhaps you could tell them you plan to try again and, now that you're aware of this issue, you’ll look for ways to control the environment where the chickens are kept, or something like that.
You could also check if the government is offering any kind of assistance, since this surely affected other farms, not just yours. And if you do try again, look into specialized livestock mortality insurance; I’m not sure if it’s available in your country, but I know there are these types of insurance that cover the sudden death of livestock due to disease, which is what happened in your case.
What happened to you was unfortunate, and it sucks, but that doesn't mean you lack what it takes to run your own business. As you said, the company considers yours one of their best farms; don't let this failure, and the emotions you're feeling right now, cloud your judgment or erase everything you did right.
I have a clear head now been fixing myself for few weeks. I did went to government office today to ask for help with the debt they said there is no such thing they can only advice me.
all the advice they give I already know unfortunately like temperature, time to feed usually morning time example feed them 3 or 4am so the food will finish by 10 or 11am 12pm to 3pm has the highest temperature so just let them drink water then refill the feed by 4 or 5pm then repeat.
the only thing I learn from the guy was this plant called ketum ayam it's some kind of ganja for chicken make them relax and high it has protein in it to make the chicken bigger and heavier.
it's OK I'll pay the debt also I will register to be a teacher for chicken farm business for students the government said they will pay me when there is school visits one way to get more income to pay the debt.
Also I wanna thank you whenever I'm down like this I tend to write a lot to release the stress only happens like once or twice a year thank you for your comment I do sound like a bit1h here for few days 🤣🤣🤣🤣 sorry about that again thank you
It's totally fine fam, and actually it is really healthy that you vent and find ways to process all those emotions. And I'm happy to hear that you're feeling better and that you even have an extra job now 👏👏👏