Let me be the first to welcome you here sir. It is not often we get presidents through here. Just let me know and I am sure I can pull a few hairs strings and get you on as a top 20 witness. No one really knows what they are doing anyways so you should feel right at home. We also pay you very well and you are more than welcome to rape our reward pool as though it were your own personal piggy bank. Why stop at only ruining a country right?
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I'd like to take the first 20 witness spots for security reasons, who do I
bribemeet?