Why are Americans so bad at League of Legends? They can't defend their towers.
I took my girlfriend bungee jumping. As her body hit and spread out over the rocks below, I thought, ""That'll teach you to lie about your weight.""
What's a Jehovah's Witness's favorite band? The Doors.
isaac newtown got hit in the head & invented calculus. i broke my nose last night when I was drunk & invented a louder version of crying.
How do you know if air fresheners have gotten too smart? If they have become scent-ient.
