What you don't know
Come let me show you
Am the Prof, Yes the Boss Y.O.Y
Am your encyclopeadia
More vast than the social media
Put all the Kingdoms together even Medes and Persia
Ama still be way ahead while they battle with inertia
What you don't know
Is that I need you
Like water to a thirsty throat
Common I want you
Am your Man, Yes your Fan
Let the wind of Love
Blow us to its rhythm My Love
What you don't know
Is that I don't know
If you wanna fly with me
Thanks bro
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This is cool man. The concept is alright, I think you could have went a bit more in depth with it.
Also, I'd really like to see you work on your bar structure.
Instead of this
It should be this
When you look at it that way, your verse isn't really even 16 bars. Technically that would disqualify you from the competition, but since there are only 3 entries this week I am going to let it slide.
So all in all I would suggest focusing on writing in actual bars and start focusing more on end rhymes. A great website to help with rhymes would be rappad.co or rhymezone.com... Both are really dope!
Keep dropping!
I really appreciate the counsel bud
Thanks for the sites